...Transition...

Just another day...

2008-01-02T01:34:00.001+08:00

The past year has been good to me. I have met some great people, and one person in particular has suddenly and unexpectedly grabbed my heart. Now I can't stop thinking about this person every minute of every day and I count the seconds until I see her again...

But true to my luck when it comes to matters of the heart, the situation could not be more complex and the future is very uncertain, which is killing me. I can't even tell her how crazy I am about her and how much I miss her...

Fucking hell...

Tag Survey Thingy

2007-03-26T23:37:00.000+08:00

Can't remember how I got this...but it's been overdue to be posted...enjoy!

1) How am I feeling today? All eyez on Me - Monica
2) Where will I get married? Party to Damascus – Wyclef and missy Elliott
3) What is my best friend's theme song? Let it Whip – Dazz Band
4) What was high school like? Bring Em Out – T.I.
5) What is the best thing about me? Insane in the Brain – Cypress Hill
6) How is today gonna be? Don’t Be Shy – Bombay Rockers
7) What is in store this week? Me, Myself and I - Beyonce
8) What song describes my parents? You Can Do It – Ice Cube
9) How is my life going? Mamacita – Public Announcement
10) What song will they play at my funeral? Doin It Well - LL Cool J (rotfl!)
11) How does the world see me? Number 1 – Pharell ft Kanye West (YEAH)
12) What do my friends see in me? Call on Me – Erik Prydz
13) Do people secretly lust about me? Smack My Bitch Up - Prodigy
14) How can I make myself happy? Saaki – Musafir (hindi alco song!)
15) What should I do with my life? Beautiful Maria of My Soul – Mambo Kings
16) Will I ever have children? Rock the Casbah – The Clash
17) What is some good advice? Woman Trouble – Craig David and the Artful dodger (how true!)
18) What do I think my current theme song is? Gangsta’s Paradise - Coolio
19) What does everyone else think of my current life? Houston – I Like That
20) What type of women do you like? Treat Her Like a Lady - Temptations
21) Will you get married? Strangers in the Night – Frank Sinatra (not a good sign)
22) Where will I live? Space Cowboy - Jamiroquai
23) What should I do with my love life? Sexy Love - NeYo
24) What will your dying words be? Blame it on the Boogie – Michael Jackson (haha, priceless!)
25) When Im having sex I say? LL Cool J - Hush
26) When I meet a guy/girl for the first time I say? Get to Know Ya - Maxwell
27) When my parents are angry I say? On Fire – Lloyd Banks

Haha...reading through it again...some of them are pretty funny I must say!

Of Midgets and Spider-Men

2007-02-04T21:40:00.000+08:00

Ok, so I was at Zouk last nite on the invite of my mate Benji, whom I hadn't seen in a few years. The night was not unlike any other clubbing nite (tho there was one supafyne South American chick infront of my table), except for 2 things. No, make that 6 things...

First up, there was this midget, in a flourescent green court jester costume no less, who starts shakin it on the podium. And he wasn't just quietly bopping his head to the beat, the dude was all out over-the-top dancing freaky style! In short (!), he was burnin up the floor. It didn't help matters when the DJ started spinning "Shorty Like Mine". Priceless!

You would think that was enough entertainment for one night. But no, if Mr Midget (MM)thought he had the spotlight firmly on his tiny frame, he had another thing comin. In fact, he had 5 things comin!

It hadn't been a few minutes since MM was doin his thang when in walked 5 white dudes in skin tight SpiderMan costumes. Not just skin-tight, these were the midriff baring version as well! The kind that would look hot on a chick, but not on a generously sized white guy. Or any generously sized guy, for that matter. And here we had 5 doses of it.

Now these guys weren't here to stand around and drink in a corner. No sooner had they stepped in when they were up on the podium, stealing MM's thunder like no thunder had ever been stolen before. And these guys had no pride to lose as they all wearing masks and could embarrass themselves shitless with no repercussions!

The highlight of the night would have been when the 5 Spideys were all dancing around little MM. The Mini Flourescent Green Goblin had been surrounded by the Amazing Spider-Men, with no escape...no hope...what was he to do...

So they danced. And danced. And danced some more. And posed for pictures. And picked up some chicks. Right up till the lights came up. For a while at least, the Mini Green Goblin and his eternal nemesis (+4) were happily inebriated, dancing like only old friends do - the cobwebs of hate and enmity torn away, even if only for a few hours.

Pretty fucking good entertainment it made, I'll say! The only downside is that I was really diggin this track called "World, Hold On (Children of the Sky)" by Bob Sinclair. But now everytime I listen to that song I only see the mental image of 5 SpiderMen with no rhythmm groovin with a midget!

ARRGHHH!!!

2007-01-02T22:07:00.000+08:00

I am so bloody pissed right now...out of all the effing shirts of for me to get a red wine stain on...it just HAD to be my new Raoul shirt which I got for my new job. RAOUL!!!! Not effing cheap you know. AND I was so careful not to get any wine on it...I don't even know when it happened. It's a white shirt at that!!!! It's the most expensive shirt I've ever bought. Talk about luck....

At present time, I have used 1 can of soda water and 2 cans of tonic water and a hell of a lot of effort to get that tiny stain off. The skin is peeling off my knuckles from all that scrubbing. The stain is mostly gone, but there is still a light shadow. On a white shirt, that is enough.....

I am now hoping that some Dynamo on the stain overnight with a good handwash tomorrow will do the job...please dear God....pleaasssssseeeeeee!

I will be praying hard tonight.

UPDATE : As if the wine stain wasn't enough, my recently purchased jogging shoes went missing yesterday. I suspect my apartment rubbish collectors must have taken it as they were in a plastic bag. Idiots...However, as of this morning the wine stain was gone. Will have to wait until the shirt dries to assess the damage to the material from all the scrubbing.

New Year!

2007-01-02T15:49:00.000+08:00

2007 is here! For me, I'm looking forward to my new job which starts on the 16th. Finally, job with a good company that has scope for career development and it's something that I'm interested in. Oh yeah, I get to enjoy public holidays too! I hate the working on public holidays crap that is required at my current job.

Ladies and gentlemen, presenting.....

In a couple of weeks, I will be reporting for work to the Information Risk Management department under the Business Advisory wing of Klynveld Pete Marwick Goerdeler - better known as KPMG. Even my business card will sound fairly impreessive. The official title is "Executive - Information Risk Management". No one has to know that it's a junior exec, ok?

It will be one day shy of exactly one year since I started work that I will be joining KPMG. I started my current job on the 17th of January 2006, and I start at KPMG on the 16th of January 2007.

I cannot put into words how happy and excited I am to be joining KPMG. I have been trying to join them since January of last year and it took months of trying before I finally got an interview. Then it took another few months for it to materialize into an offer. In fact my interviewer did mention that they have a few copies of my resume, which I kept sending in at different intervals over the last year.

Here's to new beginnings!

Exam!!!

2006-12-08T15:30:00.000+08:00

I've been off this whole week..heaven some might say, but I've been stuck at home trying to study. Can't go watch a movie..can't go mall hopping...can't even go and have a prerequisite "1 or 2", if you know what I mean.

Well, actually, sometimes it does feel like heaven. Here's my definition :

Wake up at 7 in the morning and think "Damn, got to get to fucking work"...and then realize that you're off and can sleep all you want!

In that single moment, I know what it feels like to reach nirvana.

Well, actually I've got nothing much to write about other than my lonely week staring at books. Can't wait for the exam to be over tomorrow. Here's the itinerary :

1.00 pm : Exam over!!
1.01 pm : Drink!
1.30 pm : Take a piss
1.32 pm : Drink!
2.15 pm : Surface for some air
2.16 pm : Drink!

At about 4 I predict that I should catch up on some sleep. Maybe wake up at 6, have a coffee and head out for a jog...take a shower, grab a bite etc...

7.30 pm : Drink!
9 pm : Man U vs Man City! ( this basically equals "Drink!")
11.00 pm : Meet up fellow exam candidate Raaj
11.30 pm : Drink!

It's all in the planning, I tell you. Wish me luck!

Return of the JeBhai

2006-11-07T23:45:00.000+08:00

After almost being wiped out, the JeBhai is back! Completely overthrown and mercilessly hunted down by the evil Empire (aka work), my favourite blogger (aka me) is back after many months of training in the ways of (blog)Force.

Ok, forgive the stupid analogy. It all sounded when I accidentally discovered that Jedi and Bhai rhyme about 45 seconds ago. But to be honest, I have been giving up my life for m work these last few months. If you scroll down to a couple of posts earlier, there was one aforementioned highly intellectualy challenged co-worker of mine. Well, the stupid b***h got fired at last. I don't feel any remorse saying that because she was one of the dumbest people I've ever met and was screwing things faster than a horny Chow Kit hooker. Creating more work for half of the Helpdesk, my boss had to take the brunt of the firing from higher management. Until one day, he could take the firing no more and did some firing of his own! And everyone lived happily ever after....

Except me! For a good 3 months after that, my 3-man team was surviving on two people. Hence, my office life took over. No blog. No after work movies, drinks, dinners etc. Just work, sleep, work, get drunk on weekends out of sheer frustration, repeat process. Things are finally improving after we got a replacement last month.

Anyways, let's not focus on the negative. Here are some positives :

1 - Finally got myself a car! Woohoo! I call her Shilpa after the most gorgeous actress in the
world
2 - Got my complete DJ set after years of saving and dreaming. Had my first official gig last
week for a friend's party!
3 - Got that all important KPMG interview and got shortlisted! Awaiting further feedback from
them now
4 - Went for a 70s themed party fully decked in 70s with the afro wig and oversized peace sign.

I am still single though. But fuck that. My luck sucks when it comes to chicks.

I also managed to find some retro black and white posters which I've been searching for for months. Think Scarface, Godfather, James Dean, Brat Pack etc. Managed to get myself posters of Marilyn Monroe, James Dean, Godfather Part III, Scarface and one awesome Bruce Lee with one of his classic quotes. All in black and white. these are gonna look amazing once I've framed and hung em up.

Last Friday was my bosses farewell. The same boss who got rid Ms. dumbass. It was some night, believe me. I'll blog about it in my next post.

Feels good to be back!

Jobs....

2006-05-11T12:23:00.000+08:00

Seen on a Jobstreet ad....

MINIMIM CGPA OF 3.0 REQUIRED. CANDIDATES WITH STRONG ENGLISH & BAHASA MALAYSIA ORAL AND WRITTING SKILLS WILL HAVE ADDED ADVANTAGE.

Stress!!

2006-05-04T18:59:00.000+08:00

I tell you there's so much shit going on at work it's unbelievable. I am part of a 3-person team where in this case there is an "I" in team. I as in me. My two teammates are more useless than a sauna in the desert. To make a long story short, they both have no idea what "work ethic" is. I even caught one of them engaging in trying to discreetly pass on her work to my load. Bitch! And she has the nerve to deny it. I tell you....one of these days Mount Diablo is just gonna blow. Going to my superior won't help as this superior is equally as inept as the other 2 bozos. Well...hopefully I won't be here for much longer. I am trying to escape this job asap.

Behold a prime example of Bitch's (let's call her B, shall we?) ineptitude :

B : Can you help me with this?
Me : Yo, speak up woman.
B : (Louder) Can you help me with something?
Me : Wassap?
B : I'm having a problem with my Lotus Notes (it's an email client sort of like Outlook)
Me : Aside from you, what seems to be the problem?
B : For some reason, I can't drag emails to this folder (We all have our own individual folders where we can drag and move emails to)
Me : Hmm...lemme take a look...

B attempts to drag an email to her folder.....a "No Entry" symbol shows.

Me : Woman, from where to where are you dragging emails to?
B : Huh?
Me : You cannot drag emails from your own folder to your own folder, woman!!!
B : Ohh....okay now I just feel stupid.
Me : Is it any wonder!!

Stupid woman was trying to move emails from her own folder....to her own folder. Pure genius! I tell you she does no justice to the term "tubelight".

Okay, so I edited the conversation just a liiitle for "clarity".

Did I mention that this woman's breath absolutely stinks. Seriously man. So much so that I buy and distribute 10 Hacks sweets every day to all my colleagues including her to indirectly alleviate the smell.

Oh yeah, did I also mention that my other teammate's breath stinks of cigarettes from about 3 feet away. Seriously!

There are a lot more examples I could get into, but screw it. Bitching session's over for now.

Aaaaaanyways, the weekend is almost here. Tomorrow is Friday and as I always say - "Every Friday is a good Friday!".

Speaking of weekends, I just bought what I thought were pint beer glasses from Ikea. Hey, beer glasses are a must have man! Plates and spoons and forks are important and all, but nothing comes close to matching the importance of the great Beer Glass. Anyways, when I actually tried out my fantastic new glasses, turns out they were not pint glasses. These actually hold 2 cans of beer exactly. That was the single most life-defining moment I've ever experienced. Tears of joy streamed down my face as I grasped my can of Carlsberg in one hand.....and proceeded to grab another can with my free hand! 2 cans!!! Hahah!!

I know I sound like a bloody alcoholic but I don't give a damn. I got two bloody asswipes to deal with at work every fucking day. AARRGGHHH!!!! Get me a beer now!!!!!

Close encounters of the dancefloor kind

2006-02-05T23:28:00.000+08:00

Everyone looks forward to the weekends, and I am no different.

Because weekends mean clubbing!! Party farty arty baby!!

The crux of clubbing/partying has always been the same through the ages. The old adage best explains the 3 primary ingredients of a night of debauchery - "Wine, Women and Song"

Personally I prefer "Vodka, Chicks and R&B".

With my newly obtained "Working Man" status, I am now able to go clubbing with a zest and verve so strong that I sometimes feel like I'm floating on the dancefloor.

Actually, that could be the alcohol - but anyways....

Me and my "crew" - yes I have a "crew" - have been frequenting this Punjabi club called "Sharara". The reasons we hit this joint are as follows:

- One of my "crew" can only find his partying nirvana on bhangra music
- The manager treats us very well
- My cousin is one of the deejays there
- Punjabi wimmin
- 250 a bottle!

You can put them in your own order of importance. I just can't do it. It's too tough.

Anyways last nite, we hit the place at around midnite. Alerting the manager to our imminent arrival beforehand, we were promptly given a table next to the dancefloor and DJ console, on a raised platform where we can chill on sofas. Walking through the somewhat packed crowd straight to our table in full view of everyone was the closest I've felt to royalty.

Now let me tell you a story about a girl I met during a wedding function a few months back. Well actually I tried to meet her lah, without much success. I was lucky she even said "Hello" to me. I tried to dance with her upon being introduced by a mutual friend, but no interest was shown despite my exhuberant attempts to impress her with my dancing skillz. Score : Rejection 1 - Me 0.

A couple of weeks ago I once again met her at a function at a relatives place. Well actually once again I tried to meet her but to no avail. I made eye contact, smiled and waited for a response...

Score : Rejection 2 - Me 0

At this point I'm thinkin "Screw it man. Don't waste your time. It's her loss anyways, not yours".

No really, it IS her loss. I am that much of a man to be able admit that without shame.

So anyways, back to last nite. There I was chilling on our (VIP) table by the dancefloor. I had my eye on this girl in a red dress. Couldn't really get a good look at her though as it was dark. So I made do with watching her shake her booty on the floor.

Suddenly, she makes eye contact with me, so naturally I smile back. THEN, she calls me over...

At this point I nearly spilled half my glass at the shock of the situation. I was on unfamiliar territory.

So I go over to her...

Woman In Red (WIR) : Youre (xxxx)'s nephew right?
Me: Err, yes. *clears throat* Yes I am. Do I know you from somewhere?
WIR: You're XXXXX right? You were at the function in Setapak a couple of weeks ago. I saw you there...
Me: Yeah I was..oh ok. Now I recognise you! Sorry la, bad lighting and all you see (cue nervous laugh)

Honestly people, I really didn't recognise her. It WAS dark okay!!! And from what little I knew, apparently she was a good, innocent girl type so she was one of the last people I'd expected to see on the dancefloor of a club.

Me: By the way, I'm so sorry, but I can't remember your name.
WIR: *Look of shock* Huh?! You can't remember my name?
Me: Yes. I'm so sorry...what is it again?
WIR: I'm XXXXX
Me: Oh, ya ya. That's right, now I remember...

What do you expect la woman? I got introduced to you once where you subsequently proceeded to buat tak tau to me. You want me to remember your name after that? Strange though that she seems to remember me pretty well. Hmmmmmm.....

It's amazing what a good table and a couple of bottles, and a bit of clout where we APPEAR to be people with some status can do eh? I emphasize onthe word appear because the truth is none of my "crew" are big shots. We're just regular people who happen to be regular customers and know the manager well besides being related to the DJ.

Maybe it wasn't that...it could have been my dashing good looks, charming demeanour and razor sharp sense of style.

But if that were true, I'll be expecting to wake up tomorrow to the sight of pigs in Armani suits and Ferragamo shoes flying over the sky whilst dropping wads of money all over the place.

:-))))))))))))))))

2006-02-05T22:33:00.000+08:00

Don't look no further! Baby im back (yeah)
I'm here to cater to you (anything you want me to, I'll do it)
Cause I'll be your blogger (i'll be your blogger)
I'll be your best friend
Tell me what I gotta do (tell me what I gotta do and i'll do it)

I was gone for a few months but now im home
Please forgive me for being a rolling stone
Please forgive me let me polish it up like chrome
Got off the phone till I left my readers alone

Let my spark your interest, now there's no more waiting on the internet
Cause you already know how I get it wet, how I blog it so saucy and I get respect
You don't have to look no further, you dealin with the whole enchilada
You don't have to look no further, my blog is hotter then a fire starter

ElDiabloCorneo is back!! A lot has happened in the 3 months or so since I last blogged. Just tarak mood lah guys. After Deepavali I went through a slightly depressed phase due to some reasons which you guys will never find out. Today though, I'm at a point in my life where I feel as happy as I ever have for a damn long time! Everyday when I wake up, I can hear "Flashdance, What A Feeling" playing in my head. The sun is like a giant shiny disco ball, the birds sing as though Mozart himself will shoot them if they miss a note and I break out into delirious near-orgasmic delight at the thought that I can finally afford my own alcohol!

Well, actually I just snooze my alarm for half an hour and curse the world for having to be in the office at by 8 fucking a.m. everyday.

Fact is, I've been waiting for this all my life. I'm finally at the point when I am my own person, I have my own freedom, I don't have to ask for permission or answer to people for anything I do. It just feels so bloody damn good to be working. Screw all of you who say "Oh, trust me, you'll be missing college life once you start working". You have obviously never set foot into the morgue of a college called APIIT - where 75% of the student population are guys and 75% of the girls are nerds. GOOD RIDDANCE!!! Where you have to wear slacks and shirts every fucking day. Where you have to travel halfway around the world to reach the bloody campus. In fact I think they just discovered an indigeneous canniballistic tribe living behind the campus.

Since Deepavali, I've been slacking and looking for jobs. I applied to so many places but never received a single reply. Then I got offered a part-time job at Air Asia which seemed a good deal. At least I could earn some money while hunting for a full-time job.

On my 4th day of work, I got called for an interview.

On the morning of my 5th day of work, I went for the interview.

During lunch break on my 5th day of work, I got offered the job.

In the evening of my 5th day of work, Intel calls me for an on the spot phone interview. INTEL!!

Tuesday the following week, I started work at my new workplace.

The following Saturday, I find myself back in Penang being interviewed at Intel.

I hope to be getting a final call from them sometime next week.

So you see people, the moral of the story is never give up. Even if you're sick of slacking, don't worry - slack some more. When things finally start going for you, it will go all out la!

Actually, assuming the Intel opportunity does go well and eventually turns into an offer, it will put me in a very difficult situation. On one side, I'm very very the happy in KL right now. Life is sweeter than a mamak Milo ais. I like my workplace (we have our own gym!), colleagues are cool, I love the place where I live, I have great friends whom I can have massive fun with during weekends, and there are actually Punjabi girls here! There's even one living right across my apartment unit. I don't want to go back to Penang. Penang is dead!!!! I'll be doomed to an arranged marriage if I end up in Penang!!!

But on the other hand, how can you say "TAK NAK" to a company like Intel.

So therein lies my potential "rock and a hard place" situation.

It's all in God's hands now. *Looks up to the sky/ceiling* Dude, you gotta choose for me. Good job vs involuntary celibacy.

Please choose wisely.

Celebrations!

2005-10-26T02:39:00.000+08:00

Diwali is around the corner! Which means the whole extended family will be in Penang for the annual celebration. This year, though, it is a double celebration. For me, it's a triple celebration thanks to my results!!

Although I just got my results, I'm not expecting to be the man of the hour when everyone's around. This is because my uncle's wife will be giving birth to her second child this Saturday. This is not just any usual birth, as this will be the first son for my uncle, who is the only son among 7 siblings. Thus this kid will be carrying the family name on his shoulders. My maternal grandparents would have been very happy, I'm sure they are watching from above. God bless their souls. My uncle's wife family will also be in Penang this time around, adding to the festivities.

Besides that , on Diwali day we will also be celebrating my lil' cousin's 3rd birthday. That makes another function aside from the multiple "makans" at various relatives' places.

Let's not forget the ang paus and copious amounts of alcohol and food to be consumed! It's gonna be a good few days coming up! I have to exercise extra hard these next few days to make up for the weight I'm gonna put on!

On a different note, I came across this super-cool animation of breakdancing transformers on the web. For those of you with broadband and nothing better to do, it's definitely worth a look.

Cheers and Happy Deepa-Raya to all!

It Is Done.

2005-10-20T16:09:00.000+08:00

Just got my degree results online. Before I logged in I did a quick prayer at the altar in my house. 3 and a half years of work, and it has come down to this moment. My chances at a first class were quite slim. I just didn't want to see a "2nd Class Lower" there at any cost. That is a fate worse than death, especially in a punjabi family.

"2nd Class First Division Honours"

I say a quick prayer of thanks to God. Joy, relief, and happiess flow through my veins and in my psyche.

I am there.

It is done.

Time to become a man.

And the first order of business as a man, spread the good news to the whole family, including uncles, aunties and the whole jingbang lah.

You see, when you don't do well, everyone gleefully joins in the slaughter fest of the sacrificial student that is me. It is not a pretty sight, I tell you. So whenever there is good news, You have to tarik maximum! Squeeze the situation for every drop of praise possible. If there's money involved, all the better!

Of course, if there are bad results here and there, you just have to keep quiet and let it pass, haha!

Time to celebrate! Cheers!

Moving On

2005-10-04T00:15:00.000+08:00

I am currently in the process of moving from my residence of over 3 years in the State area of PJ to an apartment unit in the Pantai Dalam area. This is actually kind of enforced as my relative's place where I am currently staying at is about to undergo some major renovation work and I had to get my things removed. The timing couldn't be better as it allows me to avoid the awkward "Thanks for letting me live here for 3 years, but I'd like to move out now" situation that I have been dreading for months now. I have always planned to move out after my studies are done as this is a family home and with me wanting to have more freedom and getting that freedom now that my studies are done, it doesn't feel nice doing late nights and going out so much in a household with 3 school-going kids and where everyone's asleep by 11.

But now that I am moving into a residence where I get to be more independant, I am doing so with a heavy heart. There are many things that I will miss. I have gotten to know the PJ New Town/Old Town area like the back of my hand and I feel very comfortable here. I know where everything is and it is all walking distance from my place.

I'm having mixed emotions right now. I'm moving out with a heavy heart and a feeling of sadness that I have to go, but at the same time, my new place marks a phase in my place when I have made the transition from student to worker. That is after all, why I named this blog ...TRANSITION...

WHAT I LEAVE BEHIND:
- A very cool uncle and aunt whom I am greatly indebted to for letting me become a part of their household for over 3 years
- 3 lovely cousins with all their antics and nonsense, not to mention an XBOX ;-)
- The familiarity and convenience of the PJ State area
- Not being able to go jogging or walk to the LRT in peace thanks to the many dogs let loose by their irresponsible owners
- 2 fantastic cooks in the form of my aunt and her long-serving (over 10 years) Indonesion maid
- A very, very comfortable home
- No friends in the area (only recently did I get to know 2 college mates living close by, but still not within a walking distance)
- My beloved Ramly burger stall

WHAT AWAITS ME:
- Freedom to go and do the things I previously could not, both because I was living in a family home and the fact that I was student living under another person's roof
- An attached bathroom (Oh yay!). Previously I had to walk downstairs and through the kitchen to access the bathroom. Very leceh.
- No home-cooked food
- The opportunity to make more friends (including my opposite neighbour, a doctor who I've already gotten acquainted to, who was 2 daughters about my age. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm * cue evil laugh*)
- The ability to go jogging in peace
- No LRT station within walking distance. I need to take a bus first. AAARRGHHHH. Must get a car ASAP!
- Internet connection on my own PC (previously only the family PC in the kitchen was connected)
- A lavender coloured room. I must get permission to repaint it!!!!

I hope all goes well and I am able to land a job in KL rather than Penang. I would still rather live in Penang, but for a variety of reasons, I would prefer to spend a couple of years here first. That in itself is another major decision I have to make and to be honest, I'm still not 100% certain on KL. But that is a story for another day.

Time to make the transition...

Johnnie and the Day of Reckoning

2005-09-21T12:30:00.000+08:00

Standing proudly on my dressing table, situated between my deodorant and cologne, is a bottle of Johnnie Walker's Black Label whisky.

No I'm not an alcoholic.

There's an interesting story behind how the bottle ended up on my table. It all started back in January. My brother was down in KL for a few days and had decided to check out Zouk's "Mambo Jambo" night. As luck may have it, that particular Wednesday was one of Membo Jambo's them parties, meaning it was bigger and better and located in the main room of Zouk instead of Velvet Underground.

As luck may have it again, that also turned out to be the same night JAWI decided to pay a visit to Zouk to nobly prevent the moral decay of Muslim youth. Blergh. Yes, it was THAT night.

Much to my brother's dismay, the policemen who took to the stage during the Village People's "Y.M.C.A." were not actually part of the show.

Being a non-muslim, my brother staggered out of Zouk mightily disaapointed but clutching his almost empty bottle with him.

As he realized how little there was left the next morning (1 1/2 pegs, 2 if you really stretch it), he duly left for Penang without his bottled companion. So it came to be that Mr. Johnnie Walker now sits on my dressing table. He has been sitting there, patiently, quietly, for the last 8 months.

Not being one to drink without rhyme or reason, I decided that Mr. Johnnie Walker shall not die in vain. I have been waiting to finish the elixer on the final day of my final exams marking the end of my tertiary studies - as the opening drink to a night of celebration. Symbolic, no?

That day is now only 3 days away. 3 more papers before Friday night arrives and the celebration begins. Each time I go to my dressing table now, I can almost hear Johnnie whispering "I'm mighty proud of ya son, you've finally made it", to which I reply "Looking forward to it, my good man. Looking forward to it...".

An idle mind is the devil's plaything, they say, and as studying is usually accompanied by quite a bit of idling, I put my creative skills to test. A camera phone can be quite useful at times like this, I tell you. I took some pics or Mr. Johnnie Walker.

Somehow this picture reminds of Sai Baba or some other famous holy dude who always seems to have a glow around his head in pictures. Johnnie looks so calm...so serene...almost.........spiritual.

Technically speaking Johnnie is a spirit, so I guess it makes sense ;-)

Electric blue vibes emanating from the core of (spirit)uality.

In this shot Johnnie looks like a valcano ready to erupt. Ready to spew out his fiery contents in a blaze of mayhem and destruction which will bring fertility and a new beginning to the surrounding land.

How apt.

A weekend in Penang

2005-09-17T01:04:00.000+08:00

Even though I have been living in KL for the last three and a half years, my heart lies on the island of Penang - my home state. I always look forward to my infrequent weekends back home, chilling on the island. Penang offers many things that KL cannot, such as smoother traffic, less smog, the familiarity of home and of course – the food!! Oh man, the food! KL food sucks compared to what is on offer in Penang. I don’t care if people say it’s not as good as it was, it’s still bloody good to me! I have yet to taste a char kuey teow in KL that comes close to the kuey teow I’ve had in Penang. Ok I'll stop here. I get very emotional about food, you see.

So it was that after my final year project presentation last Thursday I decided to take a weekend sojourn back home to de-stress before hitting the books for the upcoming exams. I had a ticket for the 11.30 Konsortium bus to Butterworth. My house is actually on the mainland, yes.

I left KL on a morning with clear blue skies. “Ah”, I thought to myself, “God wants me to have fun this weekend”. A perfect start to what I hoped would be a perfect weekend.

The bus ride was smooth. I was lucky as the bus traveling back was a new one, which made it quiet and comfortable. About 45 minutes from my destination, around Bukit Merah, I was half asleep dozing to the sound of Sean Paul promoting the benefits of some chick called Mary J (Sean Paul – We Be Burnin’). Suddenly….

“BOOM!!! KEDEBONG KEDEBONG KEDEBONG KEDEBONG KEDEBONG…….”

There was a loud exploding sound followed by what appeared to be a train under the bus. All the passengers were shocked out of their slumber. A lady passenger even flew out of her seat and almost landed on the floor, although it was only noise and there was no impact whatsoever.

My perfect weekend had started well enough, but God decided to throw a spanner in the workings of my weekend. One of the bus tyres had punctured, so the bus was stopped on the side of the highway as the driver made some calls.

A few minutes later, the bus was roaring along the emergency lane at the hilariously fast speed of 5 kilometres per hour. Fortunately, we had just passed Taiping, where there was a Konsortium bus depot. The bus crawled to the Bukit Gantang rest stop where we were to wait for a new bus to be sent. This is why it’s safer to stick to established bus companies, people.

Well, at least it gave me a chance to have lunch. The new bus would take 25 minutes to arrive, according to the driver. All in all the delay was about 45 minutes. Not too bad.

The food selection was, well, non-existent. But I was hungry as hell, so I settled for a simple nasi lemak with Milo ais.

All I can say is, the Milo ais was fantastic.

Reached the Butterworth bus station at 5 pm, a little later than expected. I was home. This was my land, I was with my people! Most importantly, my fooooood.
Spent a few hours lepaking at home before the call of the night jungle became too strong.

At 9 pm, I get a call on my handphone. It was my brother just off work on the island.

Bro: What time you got back?
Me: 5
Bro: Why so late?
Me: Bus punctured la, what to do?
Bro: Hahahhahahahahahahahahahah…………..hahahahaha. Sooo, what’s your plan now?
Me: I don’t know. What’s your plan?
Bro: Come over la. We go SS.
Me: Set la macha!

So it was that I ended up on a ferry at 10 pm heading towards the island.

It’s pretty cool taking the ferry at night. The sea breeze is cool and fresh, the ferry is for the most part empty, and the view is magnificent. Don’t expect a pic tho, I was too lazy to haul my ass off the seat to grab one.

After waiting 40 minutes for my always punctual brother, there we were:

Slippery Senoritas’. The only club in Penang that is known beyond the little state’s borders and has somehow managed to stay in business for over 5 years. This place is still doing very well mind you. I don’t get it. The music is the same every single weekend, the podium is always deserted, they have a crappy house band even on weekends, and 90% of the people dancing look like they’ve been hit by a taser gun. On the positive side, it is a safe and strict clubbing environment with a cool interior and friendly staff. There was even a bartender dancing on the island bar!

Pictured above is the island bar downstairs viewed from upstairs. Looks pretty cool eh? If you look closely you can see how packed the downstairs area is. The podium is located behind the two plasma TVs. As usual, it was empty.

What’s clubbing in Penang without a fantastic after-party meal? Some of the usual selections include Tari Café burgers, Penang Road sup kambing, nasi kandar Line Clear, nasi kandar Sahuban, and nasi ganja. Interesting names for interesting food. This night however, we headed to Kassim Mustafa, which is quite well-known around the country.

Kassim Mustafa is famous for two things, ayam negro and coconut sambal. The ayam negro is named so because of the dark colour of the chicken gravy. The coconut sambal is bloody marvelous. Adds a lovely kick to your food. Kassim Mustafa at 4 in the morning, only one word does it justice – heaven.

Somehow the picture I took above is the clearest of the lot. Coincidentally, the above pic was also taken while I was – naturally - in a somewhat inebriated state. Is there a connection? Guess I’ll have to try again next time for confirmation! All photos were taken with my 1.2 megapixel camera phone.

The next night, more clubbing!! Well, actually it started off as catching the Man U vs Man City game at Soho’s English pub. As the game ended at 12, well, we stayed on la!!
This time I took the Penang bridge to get to the island.

Sunday was spent at home with my family. While reading the
Sunday papers, I came across a picture which I thought was hilarious. It was taken off a Sky news broadcast about hurricane Katrina.

See if you can spot the mistake. Ironically, it is a mistake that is absolutely correct and true.

In the evening my relatives came over. There are 3 families in my extended family in Penang (including mine) and every weekend there’s always a gathering of some sort is somebody’s house. Family power!!! This time it as in my place in Butterworth. Just chilling in the garden.

It wasn’t a barbeque but there were some birds being marinated - kingfishers,.

Kingfisher beer, to be exact ;-)

The next morning I returned to KL feeling refreshed and ready to face the world. So it is that this week I’ve been stuck at home preparing for my exams next week. Last weekend was great, and as my final paper is next Friday I expect next weekend to be even better! This weekend though, there’s only Liverfool vs Man U to look forward to. Till then…

The Final Presentation

2005-09-09T00:23:00.000+08:00

Despite the completion of all my projects and assignments, there was still one hurdle left - the Final Year Project presentation. I had everything that I wanted to say well understood and ready to spit out, but I had one worry - my project assessor who during the mid-point presentation incredulously claimed "Your project is on the brink of failure" while other project assessors gave their students scores like 18/20 for plagiarised work done the night before the mid-point presentation. Let's call this dude "Project Ass". Short for assessor. Shame on you for thinking that way. Tsk, tsk. Project Ass was the only aspect of the final presentation I was worried about. My supervisor, although reassigned to me during the final two weeks of the project as my original supervisor took maternity leave, was someone I was comfortable with and respected to understand the nature of my robotics project. In my view, the G iz kool man. He tight.

So there I was, all set to present my work. My desktop had been set out, program files copied from the submission CD to the desktop and everything was set. Cue PowerPoint slides...

Me: Let's start, shall we? As you know...
Project Ass: Uhm, before you go on, I want to ask you about this....*proceeds to ask question*
Me: Uh, well sir, in my opinion...*proceeds to answer question*

This went on repeatedly. As I strived to talk about the work I had done, I was constantly interrupted by Project Ass with some form of inane questioning. My first 6 slides took 30 minutes to present. By that time I had 20 minutes left to finish presenting my slides and go on with the robot demonstration. As I was struggling to finish my explanations and handle his barrage of questioning at the same time, he said this:

"Perhaps you should just run throughor skip the slides and move on to the demonstration?"

Bloody hell, he makes me spend so much time answering his endless questions, then has the cheek to ask me to skip my presentation on my work??

Me: Well sir, I think these areas warrant some explanation. Perhaps I should briefly explain them and then move on to the robot demonstration?
Project Ass: Sure, if you think it is neccessary...

So I finish up and move on to the demonstration. This is when I take out my secret weapon!

No , not that weapon. The other one, the robot.

All this while my supervisor just intently listened, popping in now and then to ask a couple of sensible questions. He's the man, I tell you. He actually seemed interested in my robot.

As I demonstrated the different modules, both Project Ass and my supervisor had fun playing around with the robot's touch sensors, purposely blocking the robot's path so it would reverse and change direction. They were like widdle kids playing with a new toy. At this point I had also built up some semblance of an audience witnessing my robot navigate its way around the tiny confines of the presentation room.

After the demonstration, more questions were asked by Project Ass. For the record, Project Ass' line of questioning had more to do with criticizing my project than actual interest in it.

The presentation, which had me on edge for the last week, was then over - 15 minutes later then scheduled. One hour and 15 minutes total. I thanked the dynamic duo of Project Ass and my supervisor for their time and interest and wished them all the best.

As they walked out of the room, about 25 kg of weight magically melted off my shoulders. I felt so light I swear I started floating a couple of times.

And so it is that at 6.15 pm on the 8th of September, my final piece of work as a student of the great institution called APIIT was done. This is it! The chains of academic work have finally been unshackled! I am a free being, an escapee from the boundaries of the shitloads of work that APIIT has dropped on me for the last three and a half years of my life.

I'd like to thank my robot, Susan, for her patience in dealing with the dynamic duo and for not acting up at the wrong time. I am truly blessed to have a friend like you, Susan.

Susan now shares the same space with Joe and Smurf. I have a feeling that this is the beginning of a beautiful threelationship...

A Journey of Knowledge

2005-09-06T15:44:00.000+08:00

More than three years ago, I set out on a journey of self-discovery, a journey that took me to the mystical faraway land of Ko-Ah-La Loom-Poq. A journey in the pursuit of wealth of the mental kind. I seeked knowledge.

This was a journey I had to make, for at that point in time I was a failure, a shame to my own people - crucified and vilified wherever I went. "Stupid", "Failure", "Disgrace", and the knife of insult that pierced deepest into my fragile and withered armour of self-respect - "Pea - brain".

Many contemporaries had made this journey before me. None returned the same person. All of them had been corrupted by the evils and perils that tempted and poisoned the weak and feeble minded. They came back disfigured and discoloured by the instruments of Satan - blonde hair, earrings, piercings, tattoos, and likings for smoke-eminating sticks and nectars that corrupt the mind. More importantly, they came back without that which they set out to obtain - a degree.

So it was that I left the my small, innocent hometown of Pee-nangh' among much trepidation and fear that I would succumb to be just another victim of the evils of the big city. My keepers were very reluctant to let me go and much strain put on our relationship convincing them to let me do so.

I left with much resolve and strength within me that I should return a hero, with smiles from the lips of my keepers that I had succeeded where many had failed. Free from the temptations and evils that are the root of failure. I had to regain my keepers' belief in me and restore my reputation. I left a decrepit boy with no pride and with people around me confident that I would be just another failure.

Fast-forward 42 months and here I am. I write this as man who was withstood the evil temptations and overcome the obstacles in the pursuit of my Holy Grail of knowledge and wisdom. Three and a half-years of blood, sweat and toil and many moments I endured on the brink of desperation, thinking aloud "What the f**k la! What the hell am I doing this for?!". It has been a tough journey, one that has made me a wiser and better person but starved of female companionship. An unintentional vow of celibacy was made when I signed ny name on the registration scroll, not knowing that my temple of learning was 80% male dominated.

Today, I stand proud. I can hold my head up high when I return to my hometown to the resounding cheers and and smiles of friends and keepers, including extended keepers. It is a happy moment for me, a moment where I have regained the trust and confidence of the people around me. A moment where I have progressed from boy to man. The moment where I start to live my own life by my own rules. Yes, I can now hit the inn on Friday and Saturday evenings scouring for lovely young maidens that will never be introduced to my keepers, without worry or curfew. I am now free of the shackles of parental imperialism. I have made the ...TRANSITION... Destiny fulfilled.

But what is the proof of all this, I hear you ask?!? Where is the scroll that denominates me as knowledge repaired from my days of knowledge impair?!? Judge too fast, you do. Bah! But of course I have it...it is my preciousssss, my crown jewel, my culmination of years of toil.

It is depicted here.

"Wiser than me, are you? Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship" Yoda - Return of the Jedi

Wiser than me are you? Take the test.

I See It...the Light....It's So Near....

2005-09-01T01:24:00.000+08:00

Ah....life, I tell you. Keeps handing you assignment after assignment. The FYP was submitted last week, that left 4 more. One of those is done, leaving three more. Of those three, one is due tomorrow, one is due Friday, and the last one is due Monday. What a nice sequence of due dates. It'a almost like a symphony.

As far as I'm concerned, Friday I'm free! THe project due Monday is the easiest fortunately, and will be completed by Saturday latest. That leaves the very important question - what to do Friday night?!?

All I know is this: I WILL NOT BE AT HOME!!!

Honestly, after three and a half virtually non-stop years of higher education, I am so looking forward to finishing off my time in APIIT. The longest break in my time in APIIT was 5 weeks, so the whole duration of doing my diploma and degree is just a blur of academic experiences. Mostly stressful ones. Every semester there is this one or two week period where everything comes to a head and you feel stressed as hell. I'm at the end of the final semesterly stressful period right now. In fact I can't think of anything interesting to write.

In a month from now, exams will be done and I will just have to await graduation on December the 4th. I am contemplating whether to take a break first or start job-hunting immediately. There is also the issue of whether to go back to Penang or remain in KL for a while. Personally, I'd like to remain in KL for a while first. Heheh, this reminds me of a conversation I had with my dad a couple of months back. This took place in a relative's place during a family gathering. He had had a few margaritas when this took place.

Dad: Sooon!
Me: Wassap?
Dad: It's time to talk about your future...

At this point I was thinking "Die la! He wants to marry me off!!!".

Me: What about my future?
Dad: Give me your resume, I'll look for jobs for you in Penang. I have some contacts. (Proceeds to tell some long-winded story about someone who owed a favour).
Me: Dad, we gotta talk.
Dad: Sure.
Me: I've got plans for my own future. Before you start planning my life, let me tell you what I think and what I want to do.
Dad: OK. Go ahead.
Me: I'd like to work in KL for a couple of years before returning to Penang.(Dad starts to look a bit unhappy). Let me tell you why.
Dad: Ok, ok...go on.
Me: If I work back in Penang, what will I be doing every weekend?
Dad: Uhhmm....you'll be out in the same SS and Soho's...
Me: Yes, with the same people at the same places.
Dad: Uh-huh...
Me: All of whom are guys...whenever I come back to Penang we never go out with girls...it's the same group of guys all the time.
Dad: Yes...
Me: In KL there is much more opportunity to meet and get to know girls. In Penang I will be single until you arrange a marriage for me.
Dad: (enthusiastically) Ok, ok...I see your point...I'm glad you told me this.

Heheh, my dad is a bit traditional when it comes to these things. With this excuse, there was never any chance of getting "no" for an answer. In fact, I was surprised he took it so well!Anyhow, this is a true fact! There are hardly any girls in Penang. So that was it, issue settled, no probs! In fact I was surprised my dad took it so well.

At the core of the issue, although I love Penang more than KL and would love to spend the rest of my life there, as a young person I would like to be in KL for a while first. Penang is limited, even as a person who goes back once every couple of months or so I see the same faces and go to the same places all the time. KL has much more variety, more excitement. Most importantly, more opportunity and options for work and social life. Besides that, practically all my friends from back home have left. There's hardly anyone left there from my life in Penang. Here in KL, I've got loads of friends nad have become used to a routine and lifestyle. Not that I don't have that in Penang - whenever I'm back i feel like I never left - but it's the small things you know...like even the people I used to play football with have stopped playing. No more football on the old "tanah merah" field like the good old days. The scene has changed a lot.

Man, I sound old. I'm growing up.

By the way, Happy Merdeka to all.

IT'S OVER!!!!!!!!!

2005-08-24T00:37:00.000+08:00

I just lost 20 kilos......................................................

FYP IS OVER, IT IS DONE!!!!!!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!! FYP IS OVER!!!

Only 4 more projects to go.

Yes.....ONLY 4.

I feel so light.

*FYP = Final Year Project.

Disco Inferno

2005-08-11T19:12:00.000+08:00

Was having a conversation with my 6 year old cousin just now. He was telling me about a dream he had last night...

Cuz: I had a dream last night you know!
Me: Really? Tell me about it
Cuz: I was in the disco! We were all dancing. I was dancing like this *proceeds to impersonate John Travolta's immortal Saturday Night Fever move*
Me: Wow! What was the disco like?
Cuz: There were so many lights. And there was a big disco ball on top!
Me: A disco ball?
Cuz: Ya! A biiig one!
Me: Sounds like you had fun, man. So which girls were you with?
Cuz: *Sheepishly* It was...uh...all boys only...
Me: ?!!?!!?!?!?!

All boys disco? How does a 6 year old even know what a disco looks like?!?

Hazy Days Are Back Again...

2005-08-04T01:08:00.001+08:00

Shit man...i woke up yesterday morning and thought that MPPJ had been fogging or some building nearby must be burning. It couldn't be haze, the smell was too strong...it was practically smoke-like.

Then I discovered that it actually was a haze. So sudden...so smelly...so hazy...

It's no better today. The best part is my wonderful college has this open air concept where natural sunlight is utilized and the building is not fully enclosed so as to ventilate the building with wonderful natural air.

My college smelt like a burning oil field today.

Anyways, won't be blogging much in the coming month or so due to the fact that I'm currently in the final month of my final semester of my final year of my degree. So, like a champion jockey sitting astride a thoroughbred of academic excellence, my concentration is utterly and completely on the finish line. My Final Year Project robot is also coming along nicely. Perhaps I'll blog about him soon. Yes, it is male. Robots are supposed to be macho. Can you imagine Female Autobots and Decepticons? No, I didn't think so.

Anyways, I hope to devote more time to blogging once my projects are all due and more time is granted to me for my own indulgent purposes. Till then, I'll have Joe the monkey and Smurf the smurf for company.

Cheerio.

Monkey Business

2005-07-25T15:08:00.000+08:00

Today, I saw something absolutely horrifying. Something that will have me traumatized for life.

Today, I accidentally became witness to a rape.

A homosexual rape.

It all started when I came home earlier than expected from an outing. Casually walking into my room, I was greeted by an image that will forever be burned into the deep, dark recesses of my mind, coming back to haunt me in the years to come – much in the same manner that M.C. Hammer’s “U Can’t Touch This” does so today.

I saw this:

Toy story - what really happens...

My two roommates, Joe the monkey and Smurf the smurf were going at it like rabbits on steroids.

Initially, my presence wasn’t noticed. But once the resounding thud of my jaw hitting the floor became apparent, the perpetrators quickly realized that they weren’t alone. In an instant, emotions changed from boiling hot to ice cold. Kind of the same way you feel when you let out a gut-wrenchingly satisfying fart only to realize that gas wasn’t the only thing to escape your bowels.

I had been discovered. I was the proverbial non-gas matter that was released during the throes of their sexually proverbial fart.

It was that kind of fleeting moment when you’re caught between two conflicting moments. You’re on the fence of two different situations with devastatingly different climaxes (again, pun not intended).

On one side there’s the pure, primal and unadulteratedly animal (pun not intended) ecstasy you feel when you are about to slap your partner’s ass as you doggystyle him/her into oblivion.

Being caught slapping someone's ass is never nice

On the other side, confusion followed by a wave of panic as they discovered that their miserable little lives will forever by shattered by this moment. The kind of moment where you’re so overwhelmed by the gravity of that second that you’re mind just becomes…..blank.

Joe has the blank look of an admittedly guilty man. ‘Scuse me. Monkey.

Smurf, on the other hand, had a smile that smacked with the look of eternal gratefulness, which led me to believe that he had been an unwilling partner in this situation. It it wasn't that then he just looked horny as hell.

Instead of losing my head, I regained my composure and requested that my two befuddled friends explain their situation.

Apparently, upon my absence, my two supposed friends decided to have a little party.

Note the horny look in Joe's eyes...and the location of his left hand

Copious amounts of alcohol were consumed. A whole can of beer each. Smurf, who was still rather inexperienced when it came to drinking, passed out from all the excitement. Joe on the other hand, has had his fair share of sessions. So, like any sexually deprived red-blooded male, he had to seek release. Joe eyed the limp body of the young and nubile smurf and soon it became too much to resist – regardless of gender. Smurf claims that he tried to say no but in his drunken stupor it might have come out as “Oh yeah baby, gimme some monkey lovin’. Slap that blue ass. Au!”.

According to the accused, my copy of “Loaded” which stared back at him day in and day out was to blame. In his own words, it “was like an infinite lapdance on paper”. Teasingly unattainable (it was on a shelf that was too high for him, you see).

Covergirl Dita von Teese: Propogator of monkey love

I am still deliberating whether this situation is forgivable or not. Not that I underestimate the gravity of the situation, but I, uhm…I, err…kind of…understand his feeling of being deprived.

So until I decide what kind of punishment should be laid down, this is what I have meted out.

Read upside down to get the full message

Webbit - "State of the art" Wireless broadband by TIME

2005-07-21T17:23:00.000+08:00

I am writing this to you with regards to your Webbit wireless broadband service. I am a subscriber to the abovementioned service (User name - Account No. inserted).

For the last week or so, the service I have been is very weak and sporadic. This basically means that i have not been able to use your service during this period. Despite numerous calls to your customer service, the problem still persists. The most I can get is a few minutes of service before it gets disrupted again. The modem shows a red signal permanently where it used to show orange or green signal. Furthermore, the signal continuously gets disrupted and the signal light just blinks.

The excuse given to me is that this area (Section 7 - base station Menara Choy Fook On) is overcongested. This is unacceptable as this service has cost me a few hundred ringgit to install and a monthly bill or RM88. For what it's worth, I have basically been unable to log on to the internet during the last week.

I am writing this in the hope that this problem can be resolved quickly. My household consists of 5 people of varying ages who use the internet daily. As your mission statement says, " TIME dotCom is committed to providing superior broadband service to ensure the enhancement and clarity of data communication through the delivery of Internet access over a state-of-the-art digital wireless broadband network". I hope you can live up to your claimed standards.

I have contemplating writing this for a while now.

The above is an e-meil which I sent out to Webbit a few weeks back. Apart from this, numerous calls have also been made to their customer service almost daily. Webbit is Time's wireless broadband internet service.

The internet service provided by them has recently turned horrible. Constant disconnnections, connection with no data coming through and the inability to connect for hours is a daily occurence. This has been going on for almost 2 months. All this and they charge us RM500 installation and modem fee and RM88 a month.

Needless to say, I am extremely pissed with TIME. All you Streamyx users out there, trust me, you have it good. Most of my complaints have already been noted in the mail above.

Please be wary if you intend to subscribe. And you are a Webbit subscriber by any chance, please leave a comment with your thoughts on their service.

Cheers.

Yoda's vacation

2005-07-08T00:56:00.000+08:00

Taken off a conversation I had on MSN...

SiMz^ says:
wat day u coming?
El Diablo says:
coming where?
SiMz^ says:
i tot u comin back
El Diablo says:
who said?
SiMz^ says:
rashnith said. and papa
El Diablo says:
really? how come ah?
El Diablo says:
the dark side i fear, is near
El Diablo says:
much confusion it causes
SiMz^ says:
so ure not coming?
SiMz^ says:
i tot u have 1 week's break
El Diablo says:
confused i am
El Diablo says:
meditate i must. for the jedi there is no break. do, or do not. there is no break,
SiMz^ says:
dun have ar?
El Diablo says:
there is no break for the jedi
El Diablo says:
but a jedi iam not, for i am a jedi MASTER
SiMz^ says:
so u do have a break?
El Diablo says:
take a vacation, i must
El Diablo says:
good idea, that is
El Diablo says:
too old i am to begin the training. vacation, i must
SiMz^ says:
ohhhokok
El Diablo says:
tattooine nightlife, better it is on friday or saturday?
SiMz^ says:
tattooine? mondays
El Diablo says:
unusual, this is
El Diablo says:
the dark side clouds everything
SiMz^ says:
indeed, it does
El Diablo says:
what plans have you, saturday?
SiMz^ says:
sapede and sleep
El Diablo says:
what language, speak you?
El Diablo says:
not in 800 years of life have i heard this word, "sapede"
SiMz^ says:
tamil. yerenge macha!!!!!
El Diablo says:
much fear i sense in you
SiMz^ says:
fear? poh!
El Diablo says:
you follow your feelings too much. learn to let go, if become a jedi you will
SiMz^ says:
yerenge macha!!
El Diablo says:
Always two there are, a master and an apprentice...who teaches you the dark arts?!?
SiMz^ says:
professor lupin
El Diablo says:
lupin....that name not have i heard in a long time
SiMz^ says:
how long?
El Diablo says:
The shroud of the darkside has fallen. Begun the clone war has.
El Diablo says:
Master Windu, will I consult on this matter
El Diablo says:
speak you! be quiet not!
SiMz^ says:
jbdfjkngiuerho
El Diablo says:
fear me, do you?
El Diablo says:
on saturday, i will come. bring an army of clones i will. the sith will be destroyed once and for all
El Diablo says:
my vacation, there goes
SiMz^ says:
yerengeeee!!!
El Diablo says:
the dark side, perhaps, has clouded your judgement to the point of insanity
SiMz^ says:
venaaaaa!!
El Diablo says:
saturday, 10.30, my ship leaves from pudu port. beware, you should be.
El Diablo says:
that, is why you fail.
El Diablo says:
cheerio
SiMz^ says:
poh

Yes, I've got too much time on my hands...

A cacophony of events

2005-07-04T02:48:00.000+08:00

How ya'll like my new smurf pic on my profile? Smurfs rule, and that's that. I mean, all those smurfs and only 1 smurfette? She must be tired. And Papa smurf must be makin a lot of money. He should change his name to Pimp Daddy smurf. In fact, if u look closely in 50 Cent's P.I.M.P. video, you can see him sitting next to Snoop in the Pimp Legion of Doom meeting scene.

My weekend was great, one of the best I've had in recent times. Nothing fancy, just good company, family, you know, the simple pleasures of life.

No good weekend starts with the sound of an alarm clock. Saturday morning is great because the only wake up call I get is the smell of lunch coming from the kitchen. No stupid alarm clock with a snooze button's that's repeatedly used for half an hour before finally succumbing to the facts of life and hauling my ass off bed.

Saturday afternoon was easy chilling, doing a bit of project work (yes, I still had to do some) and buying a couple of CDs. It's been ages since I bought CDs. Finally got 50 Cent's "The Massacre" and Mariah Carey's "Emancipation of Mimi". Track 7 is pretty interesting. It's called Get Your Number and it samples that 80's track called Illusion, I think. Can't remember by whom.

went to Bangsar at night. I swore off Bangsar ages ago, ever since it turned into a karat, unsafe place to party. This time, however, the plan was to chill with a few drinks at 8ish and be back by 12. Sounded like a plan to me. Some of the more pleasing music is played in the earlier hours and I didn't have to use one of my very limited late night out cards for this outing.

So it was that we went and chilled. 4 indian guys and 1 chinese guy outstandingly dressed in pink. Eventually decided to stay on a bit longer as I was having a decent enough time and I don't go out much anyways. Then at about 1.30 am, Absolut Chemistry turns up it's lights and starts pulling down its shutters. People were still partying the whole situation seemed very dubious to me. They even stopped letting new customers come in. That's when I decided to leave the joint before anything happened.

Went to an aunt's place (she wanted me over to arrange her CD collection), had a Magnum and went to sleep blissfully.

Woke up at about 11 today. Had my usual coffee, followed by a nice homemade lunch of seafood pasta and roast chicken with some cousins who came over. This was followed by tea later with even more food and relatives. Yes, we Punjabis love to eat. In between I got to work on the CD arranging, which wasn't easy as there was a bucketload of CDs to arrange. After a short break in the evening out gung-ho unit of bhais (including 2 honorary ones, my chinese and indian uncles through marriage) headed off to Chili's in Bangsar Shopping Centre for more food and drink. This time the fare was your typical Chili's stuff such as the Triple Play combo and my favorite Cajun Chicken Sandwich, along with generous amounts of margaritas and beer. That concluded my simple yet thoroughly enjoyable weekend. Ahh, that's the life *says that with arms outstretched and smug, contented look on face*

While sorting the aforementioned CDs I came across a few gems which I conveniently sapu-ed. One of the CDs that caught my eye was Cool Relax by Jon B. Up to this point I had only known a couple of songs by Jon B, one of which is the lovely "Someone to Love" with Babyface.

The album cover

So I put the CD on, and man, was I ever glad I did. This is a great album of slow, smooth and sexy R&B. Just the way I like it. The album title pretty much reflects what you can expect to hear. This is one CD which you can just leave on and chill out to. There's even a track with Tupac, which surprised me.

The best way I can describe this album is that this is the kind of CD you want to put on when you've planned a special candlelit, romantic dinner for that special someone and you want to set a romantic, passionate mood that just might lead to more interesting things.

Needless to say this CD is currently in my possesion.

Speaking of great music, a couple of days ago one of the great R&B artistes of our time passed. Luther Vandross never really recovered from a stroke he suffered 2 years ago, and that finally took it's toll on him. He has left us with a legacy of music that spans many years and has inspired many of todays artists such as Kanye West and Jamie Foxx, among others, and his music has been sampled and his tunes borrowed for many of our recent hit songs. His last album, Dance With My Father, was recorded after his stroke and he did so from his wheelchair in the recording studio. That album went on to garner 2 Grammy awards, I think.

Rest in peace...

To end the weekend, I'm gonna end with something that I am quite taken in by. Yes, that distant relative chick from 2 posts ago. Today, while chilling at my aunt's apartment, this happened. My uncle from Penang and his wife were there as well...

Wife: Hey! Do you know *chick's name* ah?
Me: Huh? Yah. How do you know her?
Wife: We met your cousin last night, she told us you met her and her niece.
Me: Yeah, I did. I met them at Mid Valley on Monday.

It had to happen la...

Wife: So...how is she?
Me: Oh, she's a nice girl. Quite cute. But I only spoke to her for 5 minutes.
Wife: So short? But never mind la, relatives what. Can't do anything also.
Me: Uh...
Uncle: No la! 2nd cousins only. No problem la!
Me: ?!!?!?!? *WTF!!!!*

At this juncture something happened that cut the conversation. I can't remember what, but I'm glad it happened.

Dear God, what are the chances?

This chick is from my dad's side, and this uncle and auntie of mine are from my mom's side. What are the chances?

I'm not sure if they were suspicious or just kidding around. But anyways, my dad called just now and let's just say that tomorrow I will be in possesion of a number that will enable me to make contact with her.

Here's the thing: Am I in over my head? Am I acting rashly? Distant relative = possible? What are the answers to these questions? I know she's single because in the course of those 5 minutes I had with her, she told me to bring some "cute friends" along to the big family wedding that's gonna happen in December. Screw that! I'm bringing along 2 of best-darndest-looking, gorgeous hunk friends I have. So it's set: Me, myself and I are the only ones going. I can already see the candlelit dinner with Jon B's Cool Relax soundtracking the evening.

Am I in over my head?

War of the cinema halls.

2005-07-02T00:10:00.000+08:00

Went to watch "War of the Worlds" 2 days ago.

The movie itself (spoiler warning: skip the next few paragraphs if you haven't watched it yet) wasn't too bad. The beginning was fantastic and really kept me engrossed. In fact most of the movie was great. The end though was akin to getting into bed with the girl of your dreams and then finding out the truth behind that husky voice and long legs.

After a great build up and follow through, the end just really "potong stim" la. I ( and most people) left the cinema thinking "What the f**k?".

They died by disease. Surely after millions of years of planning and surveying, they would have thought about that risk? Didn't they get any diseases when they came here to plant the damn machines in the ground?

That brings me to another question. Why didn't they just take over the earth when they came here millions of years ago in the first place? Heck of a lot less trouble it would have been, without us humans in the way. Perhaps they just wanted some glamour la.

Anyways, I know the story is based on H.G. Wells book, which I haven't read, so Spielberg can't be blamed if the storyline is unchanged from the book. If that's the case, I think he's created a great movie. Definitely worth your admission price.

So much for my review.

On to the real issue.

Can't we watch movies in peace anymore? Throughout the course of the movie (and others), I encountered:

1. The sound of a tamil movie from the hall next door eminating from somewhere in the back. What the heck?! These halls are supposed to be soundproof! You have no idea how irritating it is when you're totally engrossed in the first emergence of the aliens when suddenly the sounds of a Tamil song bursts rapturously into your ears!

No disrespect to Tamil movies y'all. It ain't their fault.

2. Idiots, idiots, idiots who are just too dumb, stupid and ignorant to get that the Nokia public service announcement before the movie IS THERE FOR A REASON!

At least twice the dude in front of me let his phone ring, yes RING, before nonchalantly answering it and proceeded to blab away. How can people be so stupid as to do that?

Another "no disrespect" announcement here. This time to all my Chinese friends out there.

Whenever some idiot lets his phone ring and follows it up with a conversation like his bapak owns the cinema, it's always some "Ah Beng" or "Ah Lian" type. Why? Why so kiasu until like that? I have a lot of Chinese friends, I'm not trying to be a racist here. Fine, you need your calls, they're important for some reason, okay. Put your phone on silent/vibrate mode. What's so difficult about that?

Speaking of silent mode, here's my next grouse. The one that angers me the most.

3. People who go to the movies and leave your phone on. Fine. If you're a doctor, a politician, someone on call or anything along those lines. Leave your phone on silent and answer your calls. Outside the cinema. Where no one can hear you.

The rest of us, for which there is no urgent need for the phone to be left on, should just switch it off. Why? So you can watch your movie in peace, that's why. You can't talk anyway, so what's the point?

Key words here: YOU CAN'T TALK ANYWAY

It's so utterly stupid and pointless to answer your phone, whisper in a loud, hoarse voice, "Movie! I'm in a movie. WATCHING MOVIE LAAAA!!!! Ok, ok. Bye."

And this happens far too often. I'll say it again. IT IS POINTLESS!

You're wasting your time. You're wasting the other person's time. And you're annoying the heck out of normal cinema-goers like yours truly.

4. People bringing babies to non-kiddie movies. Obi-Wan and Anakin are about the engage in the battle that will determine the fate of the galaxy's future.

Cue baby's cry.

I love kids. I really do. But people need to understand that kid's don't belong in certain movies. They just can't take it. They get restless and edgy, and mayhem ensues. Leave the baby with a sitter or relative, and come watch your movie. Otherwise get the VCD/DVD.

5. Banglas and the occasianal Indons in cinemas. Nuff' said.

Honorable mention goes to cinema screw-ups. I have encountered movies where the picture alignment was off, where there was no sound at all, where there was fantastic THX sound but without the channel that contains the voices of the characters, where the lights were on for 10 minutes after the movie started, and where one of the main speakers being broken, thus eminating a resplendant "krrcch krcch" sound throughout the movie.

That concludes my cinematic complaints. I long for the day when I actually watch a movie without some kind of crap going on. The last time that happened was back in the day was the only sound you could hear around you was the munching of "kuaci".

I think I've broken my "caps" record for a post.

Taken in?

2005-06-30T01:18:00.000+08:00

A strange thing happened to me yesterday. I got quite taken in bya girl I met.

Walking around Mid Valley in the afternoon, I bumped into a relative of mine. That was followed with the usual hugs, exchange of greetings and how are you's and so on.

Then she said it.

"My niece is here, where is that girl?".

Then she came into view. One of the sweetest looking girls I've seen. The next 5 minutes were spent chit chatting with this distant relative whom I've never seen before. Despite me being quite shy around new people, talking to her was easy.

10 minutes later I was cursing myself for not getting her contact.

I've been thinking about her since.

Yeah, yeah, technically we are relatives, I know.

Why does it have to be so? Why can't this exact scenario happen with a non-related chick?

I think God is having a little fun with me.

Anyways I'm watching War of the Worlds tomorrow. I'm looking forward to a good ol' time of Steven Spielberg movie magic. I'm hoping it's as enjoyable as Independence Day.

My Table

2005-06-23T23:31:00.000+08:00

Ok. It's time to get back on the blogging trail. This is the first post that i will have officially "ping-ed" to PPS, so wish me luck in my quest to become an overnight blogging celebrity.

Speaking of which, congrats to Kenny Sia for winning some award at the just announced Project Petaling Street (PPS) awards. Yes, it was just announced merely minutes ago. Bloggers are the new world power. Kenny Sia is not undeserved of whatever award he won. His blog is by far the most entertaining Malaysian blog I've come across. Yes, it is true. His blog is even more entertaining than mine. And to think he just started in January this year.

I'm busy with my final year project along with tons of other projects these next 2 months, so I'm a bit malas to think up stuff to write. Since i had an old crappy webcam lying around (got it free somewhere) here's a few pics of the barang-barang on my table to keep you entertained.

This is the smurf doll I have facing me. This doll is ages old and yes, I know I'm 24 but hey, a smurf is a smurf. Joe the beanie baby monkey is supposed to keep him company but my 6 year old cousin wanted him so i gave Joe to him. He wanted the smurf too but i sternly warned him not to push his luck. "THE SMURF AIN'T GOIN NOWHERE, G", I bellowed. "HE'S STAYING RIGHT HERE WITH ME"

This here thing is my final year project. It's a Lego robot programmed with Java. The lil' blue thing onit's back is a light sensor. Shine a light sensor at him at him and he moves away. If he bumps into something he'll reverse and turn 45 degrees in the opposite direction of where the bump was detected and continue moving (Right bumper = turn left; left bumper = turn right). The bumpers are those two yellow things inthe front. I'd like to make this dude more complicated and intelligent. Even as it is, there's one bug I discovered. Caught between two obstacles, one on each side, the dude keeps moving left and right alternately, meaning that he's basically stuck there.

Ah, my prized possesion, my mixer. I saved for ages to get this mixer and now I can finally mix music!! The only problem is I have to use a mixing software, which is cool but I'd like to move on to using actual CD players, which I'm saving up for. Whenever I'm stressed or have a few minutes to spare, mixing it is! Some of the deejays I've heard, especially back in Penang, are crap! They know the techinical stuff but have no concept of playing to the crowd, what's the latest hot tracks and keeping the flow going. With a bit of experience, I'm pretty sure i could be somewhere. I started mixing coz I liked it. No ulterior motives here. That's the making of a good DJ.

My beloved shelf. I need more of these man! This shelf is stacked with books such as The Indispensable Calvin & Hobbes, the Lord of the Rings, Jeffery Archer's A prison Diary 1 and 2, the Personal Management Handbook (don't ask!), the Da Vinci Code, Angels and Demons, the Silmarillion and various IT books. There's a;so my CD collection compacted into 4 jam-packed booklets stacked neatly. Then there's a clock, my thumb drive/mp3 player, a painting of Aishwarya Rai (more below) and some batteries.

This here painting is a beautiful, almost life-like watercolour painting of Aishwarya Rai done by my uncle. This isn't the original. Copies were made since everybody wanted one! I know the picture quality sucks but if you could see this for yourself, you would see how good it is. Personally though, I prefer Shilpa shetty. And Laetitia Casta. And Jessica Alba. And Tyra Banks. I think I'll stop here.

The classic movie. This DVD is one I borrowed from a frien since I wanted to watch it again. The lines from this movie are cult classic, man. The scene where Jules quotes the bible, and the one where he taunts his victim with "Say what again, motherf**ker" are just too cool. Tarantino outdid himself with this one, and that's saying a lot, considering his previous work. By the way Samuel L. Jackson rocks!

Hey, where did this come from!?!? It must be magic! Well, since it's here......

Finally, I'd like to quote a joke I got off an e-mail. It is absolutely true, seeing how girls constantly bicker and guys just chill and have a beer. Need proof? Look at the girls of "The Apprentice" and the guys of "The Contender".

Friendship among women:
A woman doesn't come home one night. The next day she tells her husband she slept over at a friend's house. The man calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know about it.

Friendship among men:
A man doesn't come home one night. The next day he tells his wife he slept over at a friend's house. The woman calls her husband's 10 best friends.

8 of them say he did sleep over and 2 claim he's still there.

Conspiracy!

2005-06-23T15:54:00.000+08:00

It's a conspiracy I tell you. First, the holidays. That in itself totally made me a lazy ass. Then I was busy being homesick when I got back to KL. And to top it off, for the last week or so my Webbit broadband service has been so screwed up that I practically can't use the net. RM500 for modem and installation with a monthly fee of RM88. Let me quote TIME's mission statement:

"Our MissionTIME dotCom is committed to providing superior broadband service to ensure the enhancement and clarity of data communication through the delivery of Internet access over a state-of-the-art digital wireless broadband network"

Yes, I'm sure.

The worst part is, the excuse given after numerous calls is "overcongestion".

Thankfully, the service seems to have stabilised, though there are still sporadic interruptions. IMPROVE, TIME, OR TO JEFF OOI I WILL GO!

Okay, enough drama. I'll post something tonite. Perhaps I might even show you guys some pics of my robot. Ahhh...my lovely robot. He's scared of light. Shine a light at him and he looks for a dark place to hide.

Cheerio.

2005-05-17T20:12:00.000+08:00

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears. Ok, ok, I know the only Romans around are Chelsea fans and God bless their Russian, ruble filled souls. Not. I've been away for a while. The hols are on and for some reason, for once I feel disattached to the net. Just didn't feel like going online for whatever reason. Just been chillinh back on the good island of Penang and doing a bit of work on my final year project for which I got unfairly fried during my mid-point. He shall repent, I swear. That got me quite down for a quite a few days and I think that's the initial reason why I didn't want to go on the net for a while. I'm more or less back to normal now. Go to the dark side, I shall not!

And while I've been away, my hits have gone past the 600 mark! Woohoo! Small fry for some of you most established bloggers out there, but I don't care! 600...wow....I think I'm gonna cry.

I even got "fan mail". Haha, this cheered me up considerably. Thanks Komz!

Hi Kaval...how are things going.. Hey remember that time you gave me your blog link? Well i bookmarked it and happen to have a read today...i think your blog rocks!! You write really well..and i think you've just got yourself yet another fan...:) Well you keep writing for us desperate readers who keep refreshing every 30 seconds for a new entry to pop up...you're hilarious lah!

Now I'm really gonna cry. And yes, I shamelessly give my blog link to every Tom, Dick and Harry I come across online.

Here's what's happened the last couple of weeks.

1. Got fried by my assessor during mid-point.
2. Put a voodoo hex on my assessor
3. Felt really down, contemplated life and what it's all about.
4. Decided to stand up and fight instead of feeling sorry for myself.
5. I took a week off and was about ready to face the world again.
6. Then Malcolm Glazer bought Man Utd and the whole process repeated.
7. Met someone while clubbing who claimed to know Jay Sean, Rishi Rich, Punjabi MC and Juggy D. Oh yeah, he also got in touch with Beyonce' about having a concert here. Then, he hands me his card. He's in the Singapore army and currently posted to the TUDM base in Butterworth. Lance - Corporal or something. I tell you the amount of shit some people talk. I hate posers man. I really do.
8. Checking my bank balance everyday hoping for my PTPTN cash to be banked in. Technically, I should have got it in January.
9. Went to watch Kingdom of Heaven - alone (cue Akon's Lonely). Then bought myself a couple of shirts from FOS. Kenneth Cole and Fubu. And a Che Guevara bandana. Grand total = 50 bucks. I am the ultimate bargain hunter.
10. Proceeded the check out the Timberland store and drool over the roll - tops that's on my wish - list. Only RM 600. Then I saw the same boots that I have. I got mine for RM150 at one of the bundle shops in Pudu. And yes they are original, just that you don't get a box with it. In the Timberland store, they cost RM700. RM700!!!!! I AM THE ULTIMATE BARGAIN HUNTER.
11. Sleeping at 5 am and waking up at 4 pm everyday.
12. Got myself a Star Wars ticket for the first show on Thursday morning. Yes. I will be watching Star Wars alone, an I will be one of the first. The advantages of living in Penang.....

Speaking of Star Wars, I was going through Kenny Sia's blog just now and his latest post is just too funny. Condolences to you Kenny, on the passing of your dad recently, but I"m glad to see your sense of humour is still intact. Go check out this post. I got this pic off that post. Enjoy.

Opening 19th May nationwide.

Mollywood Physics

2005-05-02T03:30:00.000+08:00

Got this off a Friendster bulletin...

Recently the Father of physics made a visit to earth to watch a movie. He watched a few Tamil movies and had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logics and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done. In the movie starring Vijaykanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid.

Here are a few scenes:

1) Vijaykanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Vijaykanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured. Long Live Vijaykanth.

2) In one of the movies, Vijaykanth is confronted with 3 gangsters. Vijaykanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet. Guess, what he does....... He holds a knife in his hand and throws at the middle gangster..& shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces and kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife killed the middle one.

3) Vijaykanth is chased by a gangster. Vijaykanth has a revolver but he has no bullets in it. Guess what he does? Nah...not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Vijaykanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang...And the gangster dies....

This was too much for our Newton to take and he was completely shaken and he decided to go back. But he happened to see a movie for one last time and thought that at least one movie will follow his theory of physics. The whole movies go fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed. Oops! Not so fast. The Climax finally arrives.

Vijaykanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that
Vijaykanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Vijaykanth has to desperately kill the villain because its the climax. (Newton is smiling since it is virtually impossible). Vijaykanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pocket (Probably a backup). He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached the height of the wall, he shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air, with his second gun. Now the first gun fires off and the villain is dead. (...)

Newton commits suicide.

This is hilarious!!! It also reminds me of one of the best cinematic pieces of comedy I have ever had the pleasure to witness and enjoy. It was late one night and this tamil movie was showing on TV. I can count myself blessed to have caught the last few minutes of it.

Rajnikanth Superstar was chasing Mr. Villain in a some old-fashioned white car. Looked like a Morris I think. Mr. Villain proceeds to head into some building. Our hero Rajnikanth Superstar parks his car in the empry parking lot and runs after Mr. Villain in the building so that justice can be served.

However, Mr. Villain is nowhere to be seen...but suddenly, Rajnikanth Superstar catches a glimpse of Mr. Villain running out the front door, thus our Superstar goes after him. However (jeng jeng), Mr. Villain has escaped in a car. Rajnikanth Superstar rushes back to the parking lot, where (CRIPES! BLAZES!)...

The car park is now filled with the same model and colour of car that our hero drove in just a couple of minutes earlier!!!

I swear that is the best piece of cinematic comedy I have ever had the pleasuere to experience...

Random thoughts...

2005-05-01T01:05:00.000+08:00

My dad's a science teacher. Just now he was testing my cousin. The question was "What are multicellular and monocellular microoorganisms?".

Here's what I immediately thought:

Multicellular microorganisms: People that use more than 1 handphone
Monocellular microorganisms: People that use 1 handphone

I think it's hilarious! You probably don't get it. I told you my sense of humour was on a higher intellectual plane than the rest of you.

On another note, the final instalment of Star Wars is coming soon. I was playing back the space battle scenes through my head and I suddenly noticed 2 discrepancies:

1- Outer space is a vacuum, and therefore soundless. How is it that we can hear all the explosions and lasers and the little droids piggybacking on the spaceships?
2- This one is even more perplexing. Not all of the shots fired are on target, and as we know, space is endless and without any force to reduce the momentum of the shots fired. In any case, they use lasers and thus even with air, lasers are not affected. They just stay constant and keep going. Which brings me to my question; where do the missed shots go to? The logical answer is that they would go on endlessly till it hits some poor innocent ship or a planet. So each time there's a battle, there would be thousands of innocent victims millions of miles away.

Space battles: You could be next (Source: www.oneposter.com)

Just imagine this scenario: A million years and a trillion gazillion miles away after the climactic space battle which finally destroyed the Death Star and the Galactic Empire, somewhere on a little planet called Earth...

Wife: BOB! Take out the trash, will ya!!!
Bob: Yea, yea, mumble.....
Wife: BOB!!! NOW!!!!
Bob: *Stupid bitch* I'll do it after SportsCenter.
Wife: NOW BOB!!! NOW!!! OR NO SEX FOR A WEEK!!!

So Bob gets up and takes the trash out. Suddenly.......KAPOW!!!!!! Bob is a fried potato and he won't have sex ever again. Not just a week.

That might explain all those mysterious deaths and disappearances. Missing? No sirree, they were fried by stray lasers shot by X and Y - Wings, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

Laughter Is the Best Medicine

2005-04-30T00:47:00.000+08:00

You guys have to check out Kenny Sia's last 2 posts. Haven't had such a good laugh in a long time! The latest one is about the Kuching shuffling sensation and the one before is about his visit to a local hair salon. I guarantee you'll laugh your guts out.

Laughter is good isn't it? A good laugh can do wonders for your morale, it can turn a blue day into a good one in an instant. It's like an instant shot of happiness, which for me usually comes in the form of Ramly burgers. Some people have told me that my blog is funny, which is good. My jokes tend to fail most of the time due to my intellectually higher state of mind, which in turn results in people thinking I'm a doofus. And when they call me a doofus, I usually answer "Hey, you try and DO FIRST, see if you can make people laugh or not!!". If you got that, consider yourself on an intellectually higher plane than the rest of them mere mortals. If you didn't, you should be calling me a doofus right around now.

After you check out Kenny Sia's posts and laugh your ass off, I'm gonna try to crack you up as well. I'd like to relate a story to you guys that happened to me many years ago. Because of this incident I am traumatized to this day. It happened late evening when I was in form 2. After returning home one Friday after school at about 7 pm, me and a friend decided to hit the field for a bit of football, just the 2 of us. It was kinda deserted as it was late and most people were already indoors. Not us 2, we were heroes.

So there we were. He was taking penalty kicks and I was the goalie.

Me: C'mon man! I'm not scared of you! Put one past me!
Friend: Muahahahaha! Not scared? Just watch this...
Me: Show me what you got!

Then as if God himself was listening to me, right on cue...

Friend: COWS!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This was the point when 3 cows, seemingly high on grass (heheheh, what a good pun), came out of nowhere and just charged into the field straight at us. Fortunately for my friend, he was close by the slides and climbed straight up. I, on the other hand, was out in no man's land - barefooted as well, as that's how we used to play football - "kampung" style.

So there I was, face to face with 3 raging cows. It was about this time when the "fight or flight" instinct kicked in.

Ok, ok, there was no "fight" at all. I just took off like a madman on steroids. I swear I have never run that fast in my life!!! I unofficially hold the "taman" record until this day. I hit the stony, pointy, rocky old tar road with no footwear whatsoever. When adrenaline kicks in, there's no pain. There's no sound. Everything seems clear and focused... *THUNDERING HOOVES BEHIND - MUST RUN IN OPPOSITE DIRECTION!!!*

Now I know how those guys in Pamplona must feel.

Being chased by bovines. Good exercise. (Source: Google images)

Thanks to the adrenaline pouring out my every orifice, I managed to outrun the cows around the block. About 1 minute later I was back at the field, minus the abovementioned mad cows. That's when I started feeling the pain in my feet. The excruciating, mind numbing, all confusing pain. I could not walk like a straight guy for the next 3 days.

You know what, I have this sinking feeling that mad cow disease might not have originated from Europe after all.

So, until this day, I have a morbid fear of cows. The sight of one triggers severe emotional distress and I start breaking out into a cold sweat, my knees get weak and I suddenly have the linguistic ability of a sloth. Come to think of it that's how I reach whenever I'm face to face with a hot chick.

Do not be fooled. They are watching... (Source: Google images)

Success?

2005-04-28T23:44:00.000+08:00

I was going through my track referrals just now and guess what, I actually have people come to my blog from a Google search! PEOPLE FOUND MY BLOG FROM A GOOGLE SEARCH!!

Here's the breakdown:

Result 1: ...Transition... is the 5th result returned in a search for "Penang road sup kambing". And the first 4 result are actually 2 sites, so I can be considered 3rd. ROTFLMAO!!!

Result 2: A search for "Ramly burger" returns my blog as the first result in the 3rd page of listings. Not too bad eh?

I tell you that's why Penang food rocks la. Maybe I'll do another review soon including such luminaries that I missed out like nasi ganja and ayam negro. The names just kill you, don't they?

Hidup Penang!!!

Bhais n Beer

2005-04-27T00:53:00.000+08:00

Overheard at the hockey stadium during last weekend's tournament where I took part...

"Shall we drink before the game or after?"

These are a few of my favourite things...

2005-04-27T00:50:00.000+08:00

Greetings y'all! How do you guys like my new background? Cool eh? I tried a few different ones (mostly chicks in various states of undress) but the colour made it difficult to read the text so I ended up with this. I'm a bedroom deejay so the turntable suits me. I'm gonna make more tweaks to the design whenever I can. For now though I'm happy with my blog. It looks quite different from what you get on the template provided.

So on to today's post. We all have a few things we want to have don't we? A personal bar that never runs out of anything, a harem of the hottest chicks from every imaginable nationality, Britney and Christina in a Paris Hilton style home video, an American President that exhibits some intelligence, etc etc...I have more tangible things in mind though.

First of all, a brand new PC. Not just any PC, but a rig (self-constructed PC) with high-end specifications. I also want all my PC and all peripherals to be black, with neon green cold cathode lights and LEDs, similiar to the one pictured above. I'm also gonna draw the face of the alien from the "Alien" series of movies with a glow in the dark pen on the side without a see-through panel (hey I CAN draw ok, we Pisceans are artistic apparently). Can you imagine playing DOOM 3 in the dark then? I'm gonna be scared shitless. I can't wait!!!

Here are the specs:
-AMD 64 processor 3000+ 929 Winchester (loads of numbers I know, IT is so much fun innit?)
-a decent motherboard with dual channeling (dual channelling increases the RAM speed bu about 1.5)for both DDR1 and 2. I'm thinking of maybe even getting an SLI enabled motherboard (SLI=2 graphics card combined as one).
-dual layer DVD burner
-1 gig of RAM (dual channeled!)
-NVIDIA based 6600GT graphics card
-17 inch flat screen monitor

If all this sounds confusing, don't worry. It basically means that my PC is gonna be quite a monster! Compared to other tech geeks (yes I am one) it's nothing to shout about, but still, it's gonna be quite the powerful!

This is the only item on my wish list that I'm actually gonna get. Let's move on to the stuff I can only dream about.

Being a DJ enthusiast, naturally I would love to have my own DJ set. A year ago I got myself a mixer after saving for ages, and for all this while it's only been connected to my PC on which I use PCDJ, which is a common DJ software used in clubs and pubs, to mix. I'm getting bored of it though. I want the real thing. The Pioneer CDJ-1000 is the ultimate, but that's way out of reach. The CDJ-800 pictured above is a bit more realistic and it's features are more than sufficient for me. It even has scratching goddammit! God knows when I will finally save enough to my hands on a proper pair of DJ CD players, but if and when it happens I sure hope it's this one.

All playaz gotta have a pimp pair of kicks to impress the ladies.

Behold, the Timberland roll-top boots. Damn I love these shoes. It's a boot, but you can roll down the top make it appear as above. Cool as f**k, don't you think! Too bad they cost 700 bucks, way out of my league. Not that I don't have enough shoes, in fact I have quite a few compared to the average guy, but none are as cool as these Timbs. I can just imagine walking into Zouk on a Thursday and all the people move aside in respect to let the shoes pass through. They have have these in white, which looks seriously cool but it would get dirty too fast and to let that happen to a 700 bucks pair of shoes would be too painful to bear. These kicks are fly man...*sigh*...any kind souls out there willing to give me 700 bucks?

Finally...

Behind every successful man is a hot-ass chick. Shilpa Shetty is my dream lady. Don't ask why, I can't answer that myself. There's just something about her... Having a figure that would make Aphrodite herself pale in comparison helps a bit, I do admit. While the whole world keeps going on and on about Aishwarya, Shilpa is the brightest star in my galaxy. Che wah, so romantic.

Honorable mention: A camera phone to replace my workhorse 3310. I'm not being materialistic here. A camera phone would be good because then I would be able to take pictures on the go and that would make my posts here that much more interesting. So you see, I'm actually thinking about all you readers out there. How thoughtful...how considerate...how concerned...how generously good it would be if someone would buy me a camera phone for the sake of all my beloved readers for whom I care so much. No really, I do.

That's my wish list. Wouldn't life be fun if I had all of this?

Baaack!

2005-04-26T00:58:00.000+08:00

Have been gone for a while. That's because I spent the weekend in Ipoh taking part in 6 a side hockey tourney. Apologies to my millions of fans who sit on front of your pcs while clicking the "refresh" button every 30 seconds hoping for a new post. As for my weekend, it was a heck of a fun trip, except for the part where we lost 3 out of 4 matches. We won the other one 5-0. Weird but true.

Thanks to that hockey excursion I woke up at 5 today. PM that is. 14 hours of blissfully good sleep. My body clock has adjusted itself so that I sleep only at about 3 or 4 am these days. Holidays are on, whaddaya expect! Saturday morning we had to meet up at 8 am, meaning I only got 3 hours of sleep on Friday night. and the next night I couldn't sleep at all! Kept tossing and turning all night and that feels like shit I tell you. I think the huge bar of chocolate I had before sleeping might have had something to do with that. It doesn't help that someone barges in at 5.45 in the morning with a wake up call just as I was about to fall asleep. And my alarm was set for 6.20 am! (We were to leave at 7). 40 minutes is more than enough for me to shower and eat, I think! WTF!! I felt absolutely shitty. Absolutely, absolutely shitty, with bloodshot eyes and all. A nice shot of Red Bull helped. The shittyness levels reduced to a point where I felt something akin to alright, but shitty I still was.

After we finished with the hockey I went to join up with my uncle from Penang, whom along with his 2 kids was taking part in badminton. I think he won something in the men's doubles, and his son was 2nd runner up in the junior doubles. His 12 year old daughter won the women's open singles and doubles and the mixed doubles with her dad. Not bad eh? Proceeded to makan and hitch a ride back to Penang after that, where I watched Rooney scored a fan-f**king-tastic goal before sleeping for 14 hours. Me that is, not Rooney. He would have celebrated with a few pints, I think.

It's been a good weekend. Hanging with the hockey boys in Ipoh was much fun, especially since we had a nice house all to ourselves. While I was tossing and turning, the rest were awake and noisy as hell. A bunch of bhai guys in an empty house? I do not wanna know what happened. Maybe that's why I was tossing and turning...

On another point, my blog is getting quite a few hits now! I recently passed the 300 mark. Woohoo! I also got a couple of comments from random users and not friends whom I force to post a comment, haha! I hope you guys enjoy my blog and the crap I write and keep coming back! Also wanna big up Kugan fo mentioning my blog as "nice quality" in one of his recent posts. Quite a bit of my traffic has been referred from his blog. Cheers, bro!!

Am gonna head off now, feeling a little exhausted from a working out and playing futsal after that. Was feeling kinda energetic after 14 hours of sleep, you see. Till my next post...

My Dating Personality

2005-04-20T13:48:00.000+08:00

Got this "dating personality" test off the Indian Stallion's blog. Here's my results.

Your dating personality profile:

Big-Hearted - You are a kind and caring person. Your warmth is inviting, and your heart is a wellspring of love.
Religious - Faith matters to you. It is the foundation that you build your life upon. You trust that God has a plan for you.
Funny - You laugh often. People never accuse you of lacking a sense of humor. You don't take yourself too seriously.

Your date match profile:

Practical - You are drawn to people who are sensible and smart. Flashy, materialistic people turn you off. You appreciate the simpler side of living.
Religious - You seek someone who is grounded in faith and who possesses religious values. You believe that a religious person can enhance your life.
Funny - You consider a good sense of humor a major necessity in a date. If her jokes make you laugh, she has won your heart.

Your Top Ten Traits

1. Big-Hearted
2. Religious
3. Funny
4. Stylish
5. Liberal
6. Sensual
7. Outgoing
8. Wealthy/Ambitious
9. Traditional
10. Athletic

Your Top Ten Match Traits

1. Practical
2. Religious
3. Funny
4. Conservative
5. Traditional
6. Shy
7. Sensual
8. Athletic
9. Intellectual
10. Adventurous

Take the Online Dating Personality Quiz at Dating Diversions

Makes sense mostly to me...but "religious" so high up the list? Followed by conservative and traditional at no. 4 and 5!! This is more like what my parents are drawn to, not me!!

Shame? What shame?

2005-04-20T00:39:00.000+08:00

The past few days have been rather eventful. Since my exam ended on Friday at noon, some things have happened that don't usually occur every day. It's been topsy turvy, but at the end of it all I hope that everything gets back to normal. I won't say what exactly happened, but it's been something that's been weighing on my mind rather heavily. I can just pray for things to be clear soon, not for me, but for someone I hold dear.

Now let's move on. I was reminded of an incident that happened a few months back when I took out one of my older t-shirts to wear today. You see, I'm a regular jogger at the Gasing hills. Well at least I have been until the recent spate of haze and bad weather in the evenings. Anyways, I had just finished jogging one fine day and was catching my breath at the "jogger's hangout", which is a playground. Suddenly this woman, in her 40's I think, comes up to me. Bear in mind that if this woman were a chick, or at least an attractive older woman (MILF? Hahahahaha), I might have reacted differently ;-)

So there I was minding my own business....

Woman: Excuse me?
Me: Huh? Wha...yes?
Woman: I like your t-shirt...
Me: (In my mind I was thinking WTF?!) Err, thanks. I like it too.
Woman: Where did you get it from?
Me: I can't really remember, but I think I got it from Carrefour, in Seberang Jaya, Penang. I'm from Penang, you see.
Woman: Can I have it? The phrase on your shirt is actually one of my mottos in life.
Me:Err...ehhhh...you want my t-shirt? But it's all sweaty!
Woman: Don't you have a change with you?
Me: No I don't la...

At this point I was thinking to myself "What the hell, who is she to ask for my t-shirt?!?! WTF...". I was also a bit blur at the time, tired after jogging and all you see. And if you would like to know, my t-shirt said "AGE IS A MATTER OF ATTITUDE". Big deal la if it's one of your mottos. Motto schmotto. That doesn't mean you can go up and ask for it. For example, I wouldn't go up to someone who's wearing a shirt that says "SEXY BEAST" and just ask for it like that. No shame man. You gots ta have some pride, baybee...

And that wasn't even the worst part...

Woman: Okay. Can you go back and wash it and send it to me then? I'll give you my address.
Me: Uh? Um....okay? (I was very blur at this point, ok....)
Woman: Thank you!! Here's my address...(proceeds to tell me her addy of which all I can remember is that it's in section 5)
Me: Ok.
Woman: So when can you send it?
Me: When pigs fly over your shameless self and perfectly aim pig dung bombs shamelessly on your shameless head.

Ok, ok...here's what I really said...

Me: In a few days time, I guess.
Woman: Okay, thank you very much!!

Holy shitballs. Such shameless nerve some people have! Not just to ask me for my shirt, but to then request me to wash and deliver it to her doorstep. Once I got home and regained my senses, I thought "WTF...I'm not going to deliver her my shirt. Of all the nerve...biatch!".

I haven't seen her again in that jogging area since that day. Good thing too, I'm sure she would shamelessly come up to me and say "Hey, what happened to my shirt?!?", to which I would slap her ass back to shameless-o-ville.

Well, you never know what would have happened had I given her that shirt. Maybe she wouldn't be at home and instead I would have to give the shirt to her extremely gorgeous, single, available and nymphomaniac daughter who finds me such an irresistable and extremely good-looking hunk who has a kind enough heart to personally deliver a t-shirt to her mom. You know what happens next.

But we'll never know shall we? *Sigh...*

Jeez. I think I mentioned the word "shameless" about 100 times in this post. How shameless.

Good nuts?

2005-04-16T14:01:00.000+08:00

Seen on the cover of Pagoda ground nuts packaging:

"YOUNGER NUTS ARE BETTER NUTS"

Suffice to say groundnuts weren't what came to mind. Could that have been done on purpose? A two-pronged advertising campaign aimed at god knows what...

The HATTA

2005-04-13T18:03:00.000+08:00

Arief passed me this link last night. It is freakin' HILARIOUS. I couldn't stop laughing.

Black squirrels rule.

http://www.illwillpress.com/hatta.html

El Rio Grande

2005-04-13T00:48:00.000+08:00

Was having a coke up in my room just now. Then, suddenly, out of nowhere, I spotted my bro's Black Label lying on my dressing table. It's been there for 3 months - since that infamous Wednesday night at Zouk when JAIS decided to drop by. So anyways, there I was with a glass of Coke in my hand, Black just staring back at me, longingly.

"Please, please, save me from this eternity of misery", it called out.

What's a man to do? I had to help the needy.

So I had a pack. Nice and stiff. And I'm feeling a teensy bit "happy" right now.

The problem is I hate drinking at home. Coz whenever I have a drink or two I always feel like going out clubbing or partying. And when you're stuck at home that feeling sucks.

There's only about 3 packs left anyways. Been waiting for my bro to take it back for the last 3 months. I don't think it's gonna happen. I'm performing euthanisia on this bottle. It's suffering so badly. I can't take it anymore!

Anyways, on to more serious matters. Rio Ferdinand has just been voted Britain's best dressed man, as chosen by GQ magazine. Alright la macha...Man U rulezzz.....

As for the "metrosexual" David Robert Joseph Beckham, the winner for the past 3 years, he is now officially the worst dressed. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA......how the mighty have fallen.

It's come as no surprise to me. Although Becks is viewed as a fashion icon, a trendsetter, some of his fashion decisions are as bent as his crosses.

So big up yourself, Mr. Ferdinand. May those in red forever outshine the pretenders in other colours.

Want to know the difference between Ferdy and Becks? Here's my research.

Who's that stylish guy?

Ferdy has inspired and convinced me to finally get corn rows done. I'm doing it as soon as my college allows me too.

Corn rows look good on dark-skinned guys like Rio. And most chicks.

Beckham is neither. Though he tries hard to be both.

Wanna know what I mean?

Here he is trying hard to look like a G. Skull caps do not look good on white boys. Eminem maybe, but he pulls it off coz he rolls with Dre and Fifty. Beckham rolls with Elton "Crocodile Rock" John.

And here he is trying to look like a chick. Only Malaysian men (at night, at home) and chicks wear sarungs (I'm Malaysian, it's sarung to me, not "seh-wrong"). And chicks wear sarungs at the beach, not to dinner. Take note, Becks.

Ah, this explains it all...the fugliest shirt ever. On the strength of this alone, he deserves his worst-dressed accolade. Not just in Britain, but in the world. As judge Manolo Blahnik said, Beckham is "the original fashion victim". Nuff' said.

DCCN

2005-04-11T23:53:00.000+08:00

Design of Corporate Compputer Networks. Thy name is evil. Absolute evil.

My God, what a crappy paper. I hour to earn 100 marks including designing and drawing a logical network diagram with a report is absolutely ludicrous. Who the hell came up with this 1 hour idea. Screw you!

That having been said, it's an almighty relief to be done with this screwed up module. Now for Friday's paper and the sem is over! Holidays!

Then to work with the final year project. Mid-point presentations are coming up and there's major work to be done. And there's also a hockey tourney in Ipoh one day before the mid-points get going. Holidays, I was saying? ROTFLMAO......

And the sem is over? MY GOD!! I'm halfway through final year!! That was a quick four months...

Queer eye is on! My fav show! Time to go makan my 2 ayam special Ramlys.

Defunct?

2005-04-08T00:51:00.000+08:00

Just under a year ago I became a proud member of a certain organization. An organization that was practically dead. All us new members had this dream about reviving this organization and making things fun and happening in our designated jurisdiction.

Things started off well, (almost) everyone worked hard to produce a night of splendour, pomp and party that hadn't been seen for ages in this certain place. It was as great a start as we could have wished for.

It's a funny thing you know, after great achievements people tend to become comfortable. Some too comfortable.

Since that night nothing has happened. Nothing. Defunct is the absolute word to describe this organization. The supposed members appear, to me at least, to be not interested anymore.

I, on the other hand, have always wanted to have a prom nite. This jurisdiction of mine badly needs one. It has not happened since 2002. I believe the students would dearly welcome it, and the place itself would dearly appreciate it. The problem is getting this organization to organize it.

Time is running out, and I'm getting worried that it will nevre materialize. I would be severely disappointed and regret it for the rest of my life if this were to happen.

I WANT TO ORGANIZE A PROM NITE.

I only have a select band of brothers in the abovementioned organization that I can rely on. It is with these people that the burden of any prom nite shall be carried.

I am taking matters into my own hands. Something has to be done.

Watch this space.

Food and Life

2005-04-06T01:07:00.000+08:00

The highlight of my week for the past 3 years have been my Friday or Saturday nights (tengok mood la) when I drive out to my Ramly burger stall to get my double dose of "ayam special". I've been ordering the same thing for 3 years now, but I still have to repeat myself to the stall guy everytime I go there. Wtf? Anyways, during holiday periods, I get very lonely and bored at home, thus the weekly routine becomes the tri or quad weekly routine. Today, Tuesday night, I had planned la - 2 ayam special and watch "Alexander" on DVD. Ah the simple pleasures. Thats's the life la. So at 10.30 there I was with my usual "Auntie, I'm going to get my burger" like I have for the past 3 years. But this time....I kena warning.

Aunt: Ok go...but make sure you're careful
Me(blur): You mean close the gate as soon as I leave and come back inside?
Aunt: Yes and also check if anyone is following you and all. If can I don't want you going out at this hour. Just yesterday someone I know got robbed outside her house. Not safe these days.
Me: Ok....

Buying my Ramly burgers has become unsafe. If I want to go I have to go earlier. But how will I know if I'm gonna have the craving for Ramly so early? Well actually every night I crave for it.
But the point is, something as simple as getting Ramly burger also now got problems. I mean I understand the concern of my aunt, I guess I just have to go earlier, but at the end of the day I'm just going to get Ramly burgers. My weekly Ramly isn't more than just a couple of burgers, it is me just wanting to go out and chill ofr a while. Drive a bit, listen to some music....I love cruising at night and listening to my music, it's one of the simple joys of life. However I don't get to do that in KL. In fact I hardly ever get out in KL! Not including going out with family, mind you. This situation is slightly improving nowadays. Anyways, that wasn't the end of my misery.

As I turn into 7-11 where my stall is, I notice theburger fella isn't there. Wtf! I thought he was closed on Sundays only! Oh woe betide me!!!

So here I am, blogging at 12.30 am, hungry and craving for my Ramly burgers. Which is reminding of all the great food In Penang. Ah, the food in Penang. I want to tell you guys about my favourites.

Tari Cafe (www.taricafe.com.my)
The best burgers anywhere. This place started as a simple stall where the owner used to dance as he made the burgers, this the moniker "Tari". It used to be called "Tari Burger" as it was just a burger stall back then. Then it expanded to a full fledged cafe with the burger stall still in the same location but a whole cafe built around it serving all manners of food from western to malay cuisine. And of course the burgers. And it became known as "Tari Cafe". Now they have shifted slightly further up the road(it's in Tanjung Bungah, just after Island Plaza on the left). It's even bigger, they have a pool table, loads of neon lights, big screen TVs and a DJ occasionally. I used to go this place very often when Soho's Batu Ferringhi was insanely popular with the Penang crowd and Tari was on the way back. Now I go there less often, but I still frikkin love the burgers. I haven't actually tried any of the other foods there so I can't comment.

Sahuban Nasi Kandar
As the clubbing scene shifted from Batu Ferringhi to the centre of town (thank God!!) Sahuban's on Burmah Road became the spot. It wasn't exactly super-fantastic, but after a night of partying and feeling hungry as hell, the food was heavenly. And the ayam goreng is something special, especially if you're lucky enough to get it hot! I hear the management has changed and the standard has gone down now. Honorable mention must go to the famous Line Clear, on Penang Road near Komtar. There's actually two parts, the stall next to the longkang or the air-cond restaurant next to it. I hear this is to satisfy customers as some say the "real" experience is with the stalls. However both places' food come from the same kitchen at the back. Hahaha. Orang Penang saja boleh tahu semua ini. Line Clear!!

Sup Kambing
The current king. Last Thursday I had sup kambing at Pelita in Bangsar, man it sucked. Nowhere near to what you get in Penang. This place is even closer to all the hotspots(Soho's Penang Road, Slippery Senoritas aka SS, Shamrock Irish Pub dan banyak lagi). A hot bowl of sup kambing after a night out clears any drunkenness you might have and also assures you won't get a hangover the next day. You get real pieces of mutton and the sup has a kick to it, unlike the chunks of rubber I had last Thursday. Eaten with the famous Penang roti benggali....oh my gawd...heaven. Even Dr. M was spotted eating there with his wife.

I noticed all the food above is connected when clubbing. Hey, that's I do most of my eating out in Penang. As for char koay teow, any koay teow in Penang can beat the best KL has to offer. KL koay teow sucks big time. Indian food in KL is nice though. Raju's canai rulez....but Raju's is frikkin expensive. Only can go there with family.

Damn , now I'm even hungrier. I gotta go find something to eat.

The Belated Celebration

2005-04-05T00:37:00.000+08:00

Last Thursday, last Thursday....finally celebrated my birthday with a spot of clubbing with some good friends. Nouvo was the place, DJ Moto was down, we had two tables in the VIP section, everything was set. The crowd took a while to get going, but Nouvo is obviously behind Zouk on the Thursday night "happening" scale. Anyhow, we had 2 tables in the so-called VIP section and 3 bottles for a very reasonable price, so I'm not complaining. So there we were, what was it, 12 guys? And not a single girl. Haha. Pretty much explains APIIT to you!! At the end of the day everyone had a good time so it was cool. Gotta thank my mates for making the nite memorable. Vick, the only non APIITian, the Malay section-Wandy, Wan and Ajiem. Kelly(yes he's a guy) for being the main organiser and Manin too. Then there's the hockey boyz....too many to mention.

Speaking of hockey, I'm glad I finally decided to join the hockey training. In fact I'm kicking myself for not joining earlier. It's good to have a bunch of mates to lepak and chill with. Not to say my classmates are lacking or anything, but people in class are those I meet in college and that's it. There are not many people in APIIT I hang with outside college. Everyone's always got some excuse or another. That's why I miss Ali so much, heheheh. With the hockey boys it's just a bunch of close-knit, mostly bhai guys having fun. I know you're thinking about some bhai jokes right now. Screew you, this is an emotional moment for me. Have some respect. Booya!

The best part is, there's no politics!! Five weeks into training and I've got a real chance of playing for the team. Unlike football/futsal where the bloody thing is so screwed up with politics and cronyism and the same fuckers are playing for the team although some players are not even in the college any more. The person in charge of football is in on it, that's why so many people are pissed that there's a new guy handling football. Serves all you mofos right. APIIT football can go fuck itself. Almost 3 years in APIIT and I couldn't even get close to playing for the team. All you APIIT footballers go screw yourself.

Ahhh....that felt good.

Hockey boys forever. Cheers to you all!

And happy birthday to me.

On a last note, just wanted to say something about the passing of the Pope. I'm not Roman Catholic, or Christian for that matter, but the world has lost a good man. We could do with more leaders such as him instead of the war-mongering, selfish idiots currently in charge of the world.

RIP.

The great man - Pope John Paul II. (Source: www.cabrinischool.org)

Tsunami again?

2005-03-29T02:12:00.000+08:00

I had wanted to blog about my friend Raj's 21st birthday last Saturday night and all the nonsense we did.

As I was watching "Fear Factor" a couple of hours back, I thought I felt a tremor, but I wasn't sure. Maybe I was just dizzy? Maybe the dog was doing some nonsense on the glass panel which touches the couch? Then I realized it might be an earthquake. So I go get a glass of water to do the "Jurassic Park" test, but by the time I got back it was over. Later, I turn to CNN, nothing. BBC, nothing. I add the words "btw dude did u feel a tremor just now" to an sms I was sending. The reply was that my friend's aunt had felt it. Then CNN and BBC started getting the news in.

Confirmation. Another tsunami possibility. I hope when I wake up tomorrow there will not be any bad news. As I type this, the news is that there sre no casualties or any tsunamis detected yet. Tonight I will be praying that it stays that way. There has been more than enough suffering already.

Let's all pray. No more innocent lives to be taken. No more devastation. No more suffering. No more pain.

Let's all pray.

The King!

2005-03-25T13:02:00.000+08:00

Let me introduce you, my friends, to the royalty that resides in the food court of Enterprise 4, Technology Park Malaysia. Oi!! No manners ah!! You are about to come face to face with royalty. Get your lazy ass off that chair and please be upstanding.

Introducing......the King Burger.

All hail the King....

Ahhh....they say the best pleasures in life are free. So it is true for the King. Well not exactly free, but bloody cheap this King is! In this case the King being cheap bodes well for the residents of TPMville. This King isn't just any mere burger. It is a double special (meaning 2 slices of burger patty, your choice of chicken, beef, or mixed) burger that comes with the full specs. Egg, cheese (mozarella, no less), tambah this, kurang that, bla bla bla. Customizable as hell, as are the specialty of the Malaysian Ramly burgers. This King is an eexception tho. Just the burger at a typical Ramly stall would cost you about 4 bucks. In this case 4 bucks gets you fries and a choice black pepper or onion sauce (go for the black pepper, it rulezzz). I still can't believe how cheap this is.

As for the taste - ah, the taste - what can I say. It is the pleasures of heaven and earth condensed onto a plastic plate. Even more so if you have been starvin for two hours, which is usually the case by the time lunch hour comes around. Thus we followers of the almighty King head into our cars and take the short drive to the Enterprise 4 food court for our (almost) daily ritual with the him. Be warned though, this is one burger which you cannot eat with your hands. The King is one big, fat motherf**king badass.

I can say without a doubt that this is the only good thing from our time in TPM. I will miss the King when we finish our studies and have to leave college. Long live the King!!!

You may now sit down again.

Pissed

2005-03-25T09:26:00.000+08:00

It's 9.18 am and I'm sittingin the lab before the f**king presentation feeling pissed as hell. Why? First of all coming to and from college is costing me 11 bucks today. Bloody 'ell. Then somebody made me run around like a monkey looking for him in college where I finally find him sitting comfortably in the lab, NOT where he is supposed to be. All the while carrying a bag that weighs more than 5 kg mind you. Wasting credit calling him too. And then there's the bloody presentation. No mood for it right now. Let's not forget having to wake up at 6.30 am to enjoy all of this. The lecturer can go f**k himself la.

The world is a stage and I'm one pissed actor. Peace.

*Update* - 1.05 pm
We went to see him an hour later than supposed to and had to drag him out of his lab session with some junior class. He didn't seem to mind though. Collected our stuff, checked if the soft copy has been uploaded and told us (again) that marks will be minused, to which we answered "Cheers mate! Now f**k off!".

No actually we just said "Thank you Sir" like good lil' angels and went off.

The pissed actor is now a bit calmer. And hungry as hell. See above.

Last day

2005-03-24T13:54:00.000+08:00

Today is technically the last day of the semester. There's nothing going on during the buffer week next week. So that's basically it. Man that was fast.

Yesterday I got some great news. My group got an A for our Advanced Object Oriented Methodologies project. Today was different though. Hanifa, our favourite lecturer, gave us this weird and difficult assignment about SQLJ or Pro*c, which are languages for writing programs to run with databases, for example inputting SQL commands and displaying the result etc. This morning was the submission/presentation.

Me, Arief n Chee Fai: Sir, we don't have our project yet. Group member still working on it.
Lecturer: So no marks for you.
Us: How about we bring it in a while, it's almost done. Our group member is finishing it right now.
Lecturer: Cannot. Submission now.
Us: How about we pass up using the Digital Drop Box.
Lecturer: Cannot. Submission now.
Us: So how Sir, it's a difficult assignment. We each tried. Oracle itself caused so many problems. Cannot download. Then download also got problems. I only got a copy a few days ago. Then SQLJ and Pro*C are also new to us. Even the smart students had so many problems doing it. But now we almost have it.
Lecturer: Cannot. Submission now.
Us: $#^%^(*%^&#$@#%$%^&#*&^%

Another group member walks over to our lecturer.

New friend: Sir, we also cannot do. Digital Drop Box can? Bring it later can?

Lecturer goes blank for a few seconds.....

Lecturer:Ok. Tomorrow morning 9.30 you two groups bring it. But minus marks for late.
Us: Cheers!

Like that la. Already this dude gave us FOUR assignments this sem. FOUR!!!!! WTF!!! The other three we completed without problems. Thank God for that. At least we have marks from those assignments to make up in case anything goes wrong. Those 3 were PERFECT, mind you. PERFECT. All A's. Also this module runs over two sems. So there's more marks coming up next sem to work for. THIS IS BUT A SMALL BLIP ON MY PATH TO WORLD DOMINATION!!!!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And oh yea....screw the lecturer for this module.

(Names have been changed/removed to protect identities)

You make me feel brand new

2005-03-22T23:50:00.000+08:00

Today I couldn't get the song "You make me feel brand new" out of my head. God knows why. However it is a fantastic song. I prefer the original Stylistics version as I think their voices sound better and the sitar sound (or mandolin, whatever) of the main melody is really mengancam!

My love, I'll never find the words, my love
To tell you how I feel, my love
Mere words, could not explain

Precious love, you held my life within your hands
Created everything I am
Taught me how to live again

Only you came when I needed a friend
Believed in me through thick and thin
This song is for you
Filled with graditude and love

God bless you
You make me feel brand new
For God bless me with you
You make me feel brand new
I sing this song 'cause you
Make me feel brand new

My love, when ever I was insecure
You built me up and made me sure
You gave, my pride, back to me

Precious friend, with you I'll always have a friend
You're someone who I can depend
To walk a path that sometimes bends

Without you, life has no meaning or rhyme
Like notes to a song out of time
How can I repay
You for havin' faith in me

God bless you
You made me feel brand new
For God bless me with you
You made me feel brand new
I sing this song for you

Oh yea....what a great vibe this song has. Do you feel it people? C'mon now....God bleesss yoooooooo...you make me feeelll braaannd neeewww......cekap!

Aside from singing this song the whole day, what else has been happening? Oh yeah, was supposed to go back to Penang on Thursday but that plan has been scuppered due to my ride cancelling. So it looks like I will be goin for Raj's 21st after all. Should be a good event.

Man, I gotta get started on my final year project. My 2nd supervisor meeting is next Tuesday and I have nothing to show her. Well, we have been busy with individual subject projects and all until last week. I better at least get the Gantt chart and some research started. As you can see from my previous post, getting the robotics set is proving to be quite a task.

Man I miss Penang. It always feels good whenever I get my feet back on the island state. It's so much more laidback. Less stress, better and cheaper food, practically no jams and clear skies and good, clean air. Unlike KL where there seems to be a perpetual haze these days. Man the air was so bad today. As soon as you step out of the house the air just reeks of smoke. Not to s that KL is all bad. There are the positives. But overall, I'd rather live in Penang and would want to return there eventually. I do want to work in KL for a while first though. But I guess it depends, if I get a job in Penang I'd be happy to become an island boy once again.

Toys 'R' Us

2005-03-22T00:51:00.000+08:00

For my final year project, I need to get myself a Lego Mindstorm robotics kit. The bloody thing's price got raised by 300 ringgit for the fantastic reason that YEAR CHANGED!!!! Yes, 2004 became 2005. "Hey guys, let's celebrate by making our robotics set 300 bucks more expensive!!". Idiot distributors. It's not like the price wasn't significant enough before the raise. Even before it was a bloody expensive piece of crap.

So anyways, I happened to be at Mid Valley last Thursday, so I thought I'd go take a loot at the soon-to-be-mine Mindstorm set. But f**kin hell, it was gone. There were no more Mindsotrm sets there. I was on the verge on panicking at this point thinking my project is doomed.

Me: *looking for staff* Boss, Lego Mindstorm tu pergi mana?
Staff: Oh itu ke? Yang robotik punya? Dah hantar pergi Bangsar Village ngan Subang le....

*wtf!!!! idiots!!!...timing so nice!!! but at the same time thanking God that it wasn't sold out*

Me: Uh, kenapa hantar pergi sana?
Staff: Dah lama kat sini takde orang beli, so kita hantar pergi sana la.
Me: Ye ke. Ok ok....

That was Thursday. Today is Monday. At this point I don't wanna take any risks waiting for PTPTN only to find the set sold out. Thus I dug into my "reserves" first. So just now I happily head off to Bangsar Village lookin forward to getting myself that mighty peice of technological innovation.

*walking around Toys R Us Bangsar Village like an idiot looking for that set*
Me: Boss, Lego Mindstorm kat mana ye? Yang kotak besar harga mahal gila tu.
Staff: Huh? Pabender tu?
Me: Lego punya robotil set la. Kotak biru.
Staff: Dah check section Lego?
Me: Dah le, ni yang mahal punya tak ada kat sana.
Staff: Tak tau la...sekejap saya tanya boss...
Boss: Yes?
Me: Saya cari Lego Mindstorm. Mid Valley kata last Thursday diorang dah hantar kat sini. So i datang sini takde pulak.
Boss: Betul ke? Tapi kita takde terima apa-apa macam tu pun? *checks PC* Ya lah takde. Staff mana mang nih? Tau nama tak?
Me: Mana I nak tau nama? Dia budak melayu pakai spek mata.
Boss: Kalau you bagi stok number I boleh check la. Tapi saya tau kita takde terima apa-apa macam tu.
Me: Ok. Kalau saya nak order boleh tak. Benda ni penting untuk project.
Boss: Ok you bagi nama, phone number dan nama benda tu. Saya check dan call you ok?
Me: Ok le.

Idiots. Make me run around on a wild goose chase. Cant even get their facts straight. At this point I was pissed and worried that I might not be able to get a set, which will put my project inserious jeopardy, which will put my degree in serious jeopardy, which will put my life as I know it in serious jeopardy.

I decide to go straight to the Mid Valley Toys R Us and see if something can be done there. Hopefully the set might even have been sent back there or something. So off I went to Mid Valley.

*walks to the glass casing hopefully but finds nothing*
Me: Boss, Lego Mindstorm ade tak.
Staff: Itu dah hantar le...
Me: Minggu lepas you orang bagi tau saya dah hantar kat Bangsar Village. Tapi saya pergi sana diorang kata takde apa-apa. Buat saya pergi sana sini macam orang gila je.
Staff: Uh, you pergi Information Counter. Mungkin diorang boleh tolong.

So I walk over there and wait for 10 mins as two couples each check an inflatable Harry Potter thingy and a remote controlled car each.

Me: Excuse me....
Staff: Yes?
Me: Minggu lepas saya datang nak beli Mindstorm Lego tuh...
Staff: Oh, yang robotics punya?
Me: Yessss. You punya staff bagitau I dah hantar pergi Bangsar Village. TAdi I pergi sana takde apa-apa. Ada tak stok? Saya nak beli untuk projek ni...penting.
Staff: Oh, yang itu kita hantar pergi 1U.
Me: Sekarang ada tak stok lagi?
Staff: Sekejap saya telefon diorang ye?
*waits around nervously. I get worried as the guy on the other side is taking a while to call back*
Staff: *kring kring* Hello? sdfuwebrfdgdfgdf...........................(inaudible)......Ok. Ada kat sana.
Me: *amazing relief* Ok. Stok ada kat Malaysia ya? Itu yang paling penting.
Staff: Ya ada...
Me: You orang boleh hantar sini tak? Saya nak beli.
Staff:Boleh. You nak bayar sekarang ke atau nak bayar bila ambil?

Bloody ell. They make me run around so much and they want money up. What a bunch of clowns.

Me: Nanti la...bila ambil saya bayar.
Staff: Ok.
Me: Berapa lama nak sampai sini?
Staff: Beberapa hari la.
Me: Ok. Khamis saya kena balk Penang so Wednesday or Monday saja saya boleh ambil.
Staff: Ok. No problem. You tulis nama dengan phone number.....
Me: *writes details down* Berapa unit benda ni you orang ada?
Staff: Kita ada 3 unit
Me: Semua pun hantar pergi tempat lain
Staff: Ya la. Dah lama kat sini takde orang beli. Tapi sekarang banyak orang nak beli tiba-tiba.
Me: Ya ke? Diorang pun tulis nama?
Staff: Ya...ada orang tua sorang student sorang.
Me: Tapi saya no.1 priority ye!
Staff: You confirm nak beli?
Me: Yes! Very important.
Staff: Ok.
Me: Bila dah sampai call ye? Terima kasih....

So much trouble just go get 1 damn thing. Why couldn't they get their facts right in the first place? At least the girl in Mid Valley was quite helpful. However I am very relieved that they still have it. I would be in some serious shit if they didn't. This all goes back to PTPTN taking so long to give me my loan cash, but then again, there are a million idiots out there who aren't paying back the money they loaned. IDIOTS!!. How can people be so selfish. Thanks to them I have so much trouble getting my robotics kit and I am still waiting for my new PC. Yes, all my friends have heard about my non-existent new PC. 2 months and counting. I hope I can get it before I finish my degree!!!!

Location: Kitchen
Listening to: Simply Red - Never Never Love

24

2005-03-20T02:09:00.000+08:00

Well, the 20th of March is here. 24 hours to this day of days on which I turn 24. Had a nice dinner with my relatives here in KL just now, which was good and fun. Lots of meat during the dinner, which is also good and fun. So the family part is over. Well maybe there's a cake cutting and all that, who knows.

Wow, I can't believe it man. 24! That's like almost mid 20s man. This is the year I finally finish studies and hopefully get a job and a life. And a car. And a new handphone. And a proper DJ set. And a gf. Yes, a gf. Sometimes I can't believe that I'm usually 24 and still single. People seem to have a hrad time believing that I've never had a gf. Is that so unbelievable? Perhaps I'm too choosy. Or maybe I'm *still* waiting for that right person who never seems to appear. Is my luck in life that bad, as I think it is. Or is it the choosiness again? I could go on and on but that's a story for a different day.

Well, there's nothing interesting to report now as the day has just started, but rest assured my dear blog will be updated if and when anything happens.

So what's been happening since my last blog? Nothing really except our hockey team got thrashed 5-0 by some army team in a friendly on Friday. Didn't really think much of this army team until I arrive at the pitch and see these bunch of huge guys climbing off an army trunk. Screw the team, the army truck scared the shit out of us! They were all set as well, a full squad of 20 all dressed in army pants and the team t-shirt. Now let's look at us. 10 players showed up, not even enough for a full team. This includes me and a couple of other beginners who are still getting the hang of the game. Needless to say we were throrn down in defence. To be honest, we didn't do too badly but hey, 5-0 is 5-0 innit?

I'd better go to bed. I won't be able to get up at my usual time of 12 pm tomorrow as I can expect a barrage of calls, so I'd better get the sleep while I can (like as if 2 am is very early to go to bed!!). The rain pouring down is tempting as hell as well. Before I go, I just want to say that "You make me feel brand new" is a f**king great classic. Was listening to the Simply Red version on Channel [V] just now (the original is by the Stylistics). Cheers for now. Nitez.

Swimming trunks...

2005-03-17T16:31:00.000+08:00

I got a call yesterday, while I was looking through Xbox games in MidValley yesterday afternoon. It was from an aunt of mine working in advertising.

Aunt: Are you free on Friday? We need a model for a shoot.
Me: *Perasan face* Sure, I should be free on Friday. I don't have class on that day.
Aunt: Great. You need to wear swimming trunks and pose in the sea
Me: *silence*..................*more silence*.............uh, well, um.....Friday is it? What time ah?
Aunt: Morning. Transport provided. Leave at 5 am and you'll be back early afternoon. You also get 50 bucks.
Me: *weighs 50 bucks against my pride for a few seconds*.....Eh, Friday morning I have to submit an *imaginary* assignment la (simultaneously thanks God for my quick thinking abilities).
Aunt: I thought you said you have no class!
Me; Yah! There's no class but Friday's a due date for my project so I have to go to college still.
Aunt: Oh ok. You sure? How about your friends?
Me: I'll ask around and see if anyone's interested
Aunt: OK. I'll call back tonight and check.
*Click*

Me(to friends): My aunt just asked me to model in trunks.
Friends: ROTFLTAO

Oh my God. Could you imagine, me in swimming trunks? They must be really desperate for people. N wonder they can't get anyone. To be honest, I've always kinda hoped she would ask me to be in some ad then I can get my 15 seconds of fame. But this? No way!!

Then this morning I get another call as I was soundly sleeping.

Me: Hhheellrroouu
Aunt: Hello there. Are you sick?
Me: *clears throat* What? No la! I'm ok I'm ok.....
Aunt: Alright. I've spoken to the shoot people and they say they can do it on Saturday as well.

*Why la God is this happening to me? Can't they take no for an answer!?"

Me: Oh yes ah....Saturday izzit. I have another assignment due date on Monday and a presentation as well (this is true, but actually it's nothing that would stop me going for the shoot). So I think it's gonna be difficult la. These are the last 2 weeks of the semester (it's true!) so it's gonna be quite difficult la. lots of submissions and work to complete.
Aunt: But you'll be back by...wait ah....*shouts something to someone in the background*.....you'll be back by 2. Normally you wake up at 11 right?
Me: Yes
Aunt: So not much difference what! You come back and do your work la.
Me: But if I wake up at 5 am then I have to come back and sleep for 3 hours first!
Aunt: Hahaha, Yes ah? Oookay.
Me: I'll confirm with you if I can.
Aunt: OK. Try and find someone else also la. Ask around and see.
Me: Yup. I am. I'll get back to you if I get anything.
Aunt: OK. But be fast ya. Bye!
*Click*

At this point I thiiiiink and pray that she's getting the hint. Given the circumstances I suddenly had to get my "priorities" straight. I don't think I have time to do it, studies come first, you see. I pray to God that this is the last I hear of this.

What's My Line?

2005-03-14T23:53:00.000+08:00

Went to watch a play yesterday which goes by the above title. Honestly I had no idea what to expect as I didn't hear or read about this particular play. I had a feeling though that it may be similiar to that Drew Carey show "Who's Line Is It Anyway?" and I was right. It was an improvisational comedy. I don't think it deserves the label "play" tho. It was more like watching a sitcom. It was funny enough, but nothing exceptional. Just like watching an episode of "Who's Line". 3 mat salleh guys trying to be as funny as possible with no script. The place was crawling with celebrities tho!! In the row in front of me were seated Jit Murad, Harith Iskandar, Faridah Merican (I think!), Hans Isaac, Marion Caunter (cute), and Yasmin Yusuff. SEated elsewhere were other notable faces such as Jo Kukathas, Patrick Teoh, Ida Nerina (still looking good!) and various other famous lookng faces. I felt like I was at the Malaysian Oscars or something! The highlight of the evening would be Harith Iskandar getting on his knees to retrieve my cousin's watch from under his chair. Priceless!!

It is now the 2nd last week of classes for this semester, which has absolutely flown by. Another sem and that's it, my life in APIIT is over. I've been waiting for this moment forever but as it nears, I've been starting to think about all the things I'm gonna miss, most notably the great people I have gotten to known. All this while I have been looking forward to graduation as the time when I finally become my own man and gain my independence, which is something I dearly look forward to (thus the blog title "Transition"). However all the people I have gotten to known since I first joined as a fresh student in the first year, some of which are still with me and will be graduating together. The three old guys in DF0231 - me, Thomas and "Sifu" Jit Sin aka DJ Ace. Class rep and assistant we were. I tell you the shit that went on...fights, cheating, lecturers losing their tempers at us...makes me laugh now tho. The three dudes born in in 1981. We were always together that first year, even for projects. That was a great time. Thomas is still around tho Sifu stopped after hte first year. There was also Pravin (the first guy I said hi to), Manin (I honestly though he was a middle eastern dude the first time I saw him!), Arief, who's still around as well - the coding genius...and Sundar. There's also some other great people like Jasmine, Ka Kit(youngest in the class at 17, I was 21 but we got along great), Shi Ping (probably back in China now) and Melvin. Damn, there's so many I'm sure there's names I left out.

Then we went on to the 2nd year and another group of new and fantastic people. Andrew, Kheire, Chee Fai, Ajiem, Wan and Wandy the psycho Bruneians, Subaash and of course the friendly terrorist who salsas - Ali. Damn I miss that dude. Ali come back here!!!!!! 2nd year was great, we had a great futsal team of many colours. Malay(Ajiem), Wandy(Brunei), Ali(Iran), Kheire(Somalia), Liang Ming(chinese), Ashvin(indian) and me(punjaban). 2nd year was hectic as hell man. 5 full days a week for 3 semesters in a row. Final day submissions scrambling in Ali's apartment. Man it was fun! That was also the year we all conquered the student'c council, grabbing most of the available positions. We're still around, well most of us at least. We gotta go off with 2 big events: Sports Day and the Annual Dinner.

Damn. Am I getting old? Reminiscing about old times when I still have 5 months to go. Or am I just preparing myself for the inevitable day when bonds must be broken? Whatever it is, there's surely a lot that's going to be missed about the college days. I keep telling myself that I must make full use of the time I have left in college. I am looking forward to working, getting my own salary, my own wheels, freedom to do things etc. But will I be one of these people who says "Enjoy studying while you can, working life sucks"? HELL NO!!! Studying in APIIT is no different than working man. You get shitloads of work. The campus is as sterile as a morgue. There's a friggin' dress code that never allowed me to get corn rows. Everyone sits around with their laptops looking busy and having meetings. It's not your typical college where people dress up in funky threads looking cool, having a blast and basically enjoying their youth. There's absolutely nothing to miss about APIIT. But the friends that have made that journey with me, yes. I will most definitely miss them. Already I'm missing Ali like crazy!

Friggin Astro...

2005-03-13T18:36:00.000+08:00

Been a while since I blogged, that's thanks to the mundane routine in life APIIT or now proudly known as the University College of Technology and Innovation (UCTI). I figure APUCTI sounds like a weird swear word. Nothing blog-worthy in the last couple of weeks. Zoukfest didn't happen. Somehow I managed to pull some strings and get a room although they were all sold out but some people are just party poopers. What's the big deal with getting a room?

So we move to own to the main title. Astro's service has really been getting screwed up. First, at about 12 pm on Friday, it suddenly goes off with the message "This channel is not in your subscription". So I'm thinking wtf right, then I surf to Astro 's website and there's a message there saying you may experience solar outages and to call Customer Service if it lasts more than 5 mins. So we try and try and try to call. 24 hours later, that is today in the afternoon, I finally get through. After some discussion I'm told that the account's been suspended due to a decline of the credit card from which the bill is auto-debited. The freaking card number they gave is actually different from the actual one, so I'm guessing someone over there made a mistake and accidentally changed the number. So the bill hasn't been paid since November, they never bother to tell us that the card is declined and although they said they'll reconnect, it's now 1 am and here I am blogging out my frustrations as Man U are kicking off against Southampton. F**kin 'ell man.

There's been a lot of complaints recently about Astro and their bad service. Some of the channels have been repeating shows since almost 2 years ago such as Discovery Travel and TechTV. Many people have been complaining about it and it has even been brought up on the esteemed Jeff Ooi's blog. I mean c'mon la...TechTV's been repeating shows forever...and now they've added the G4 programs coz TechTV and G4 merged. But the shows they have are from 2002! Like on the shows for games they're excitedly talking about games that have absolutely no relevance to today's audience. C'mon la guys, can't afford to get new episodes izzit? Discovery Travel also seems to have traveled the world twice over and they have nothiong new to show. Have you ever had that experience where out of all the channels, there's just nothing to watch? I wish they would add MTV India or some hindi channels where I can watch hindi pop music videos all day. I swear Indian girls are getting hotter by the day.

On a brighter note, had some fantastic home-made curry mee for dinner just now. I can still taste it....wow. Also got to check out a Apple Ibook. The OS takes some getting used to, but not that difficult I think. They say that when you go Mac, you never go back. I can see the rationale in that. It looks cool, the interface is cute and there's the whole artsy fartsy thing about the Mac. I think for technically intensive use however, you still gotta go for Windows. I've never seen anyone in APIIT using an Ibook. There are only 2 ancient IMac's outside the lab that no one touches. It's always those "creative" types, usually in industries such as advertising, designing etc that carry Apple stuff around. IPod not withstanding!!!!!!! It freakin rocks man. I just recently got to checkout the IPod Mini first hand and its great. The interface is so easy and straight. And the touchpad! Makes it so cool to use. No wonder its such a craze. Now I want one!! My birthday's comin up.....who knows? Actually the best present would be for PTPTN to give me my loan asap! Then I can build my new rig (rig=self assembled pc) and get my robotics hardware for my final year project.

P.S. Half time 2-0 to United. Thank god for Soccernet!

The calm after the storm...

2005-02-25T15:00:00.000+08:00

I've been sounding like a bloody tractor the last week thanks to this cough. Today finally I can feel a significant difference. Looks like it's finally improving. However I have been afflicted by this side effect: my voice is much deeper and it feels like my voice is struggling to come out. Like I gotta push my voice a lil before the Barry White-esque warbling sounds. Screw it lah, at least it feels better. Hope it improves soon tho, got a futsal tournament on Saturday and some prayers to attend in Ipoh on Sunday. Would be useful not to sound like an alien on those days.
Next weekend is Zoukfest! Am hoping to be able to go for it. I have never attended an outdoor festival of this sort before, I think it would be quite an experience. The First World hotel is having a pretty good offer: Standard room with 2 single beds, 2 Zoukfest passes, makan for 2 and a bunch of other useless things for 208 bucks. 190 if u buy online. I think we can squuze 3 guys into the package....totalling 70 bucks each. Maybe even 4? Makan, passes and accomodation for 70? Not bad, I'm thinking. Hope it works out...gotta get Ajiem and whoever else to agree to it.
It's been a while since I enjoyed the fantastic taste of a good Ramly burger. I cant remember the last time I abstained from it this long. Ramly burgers are the greatest thing this country of ours ever produced. I believe it is my one addiction. Tonight perhaps, since I am feeling better? Should I reward myself....the temptation beckons. Got hockey training some more...it'll be a nice treat after a good workout. Tho it may render the workout useless. But who cares! I think i'll go for it....ah the difficult choices life gives you...

First night...

2005-02-20T00:26:00.000+08:00

Finally, my anonymous blog...my previous one screwed up my life a little coz people read it and used it against me....although there wasn't anything malicious in it. I'm gonna write whatever I feel like in here...screw it if you're not happy...like the amorous grandma in the kumars said: "the toilet's that way". Go put your shit there...
Soooo....to the blog. I'm calling it transition as I feel i'm at that kind of a point in my life. I'm at the brink of graduating and joining the workforce, finally achieving independence and becoming a self-sustaining person. God I hate depending on others....god do I hate it.
So for you readers out there...all 2 of you yes...I just hope this blog can be the source of some entertainment or whatnot...cheers!

p.s. if you;re wondering what the hell "el diablo corneo" means, go find out yourself!